His Design in Our Desires

I was recently going through a struggle brought on, in part by two problems, the long dreary wearies of winter with no sunshine, and a post New Year bout with Covid. Seasonal Affective Disorder always leaves me feeling more blue during the short gray days and longer dark nights of this season. I really need to invest in a light to help with that. Getting sick on top of SAD and it being after the holidays left me in a pretty low place. Being in a low place usually makes me more susceptible to the enemy’s tactics of blame and self pity.

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It came to my attention that a friend of mine was in a similar place, but for her the struggle was from a difficult marriage. She had texted me asking for the name of the counselor I was going to. I could tell by the tone of her text that she was not in a good place. We ended up having a video chat that ended with us both in prayer for one another. The interesting thing about our struggles, was that even though they stemmed from different sources we were still looking for the same things: love, affirmation, and companionship.

Over the next 24 hours, both my friend and I were on our own journeys seeking the Lord, knowing that we wanted to be spiritually right, but also not quite sure what to do with these desires that we had. Were these desires wrong? Were we just supposed to not think about them? Were we supposed to sacrifice them on the altar of, “Well, that’s just what Christians are supposed to do without?”

The Lord in His kindness took me to a passage in Isaiah, which I felt not only applied to myself, but applied to my friend, so I texted her a few of those verses. (My friend was also being led by the Lord to a different passage in the Psalms, which she also shared with me.)

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10 They will not hunger or thirst,
Nor will the scorching heat or sun strike them down;
For He who has compassion on them will lead them
And will guide them to springs of water.
11 “I will make all My mountains a road,
And My highways will be raised up....

13 ...Shout for joy, O heavens! And rejoice, O earth!
Break forth into joyful shouting, O mountains!
For the Lord has comforted His people
And will have compassion on His afflicted.
— Isaiah 49:10-11,13 (NASB 1995)

The Lord was telling us that our desires were not only real, but good. The desire for food and water is not a wrong desire. In fact, just like food and water is a desire that must be met, our desire for love, companionship and affirmation are just as necessary.

My husband and I like to watch survival shows like Dual Survivor, Dude Your Screwed, and most recently Alone. The thing I have found fascinating is that not everyone leaves due to starvation or injury. In fact, often times it is the aloneness of their situation that finally drives them to pushing the button to tap out. We are made to be in relationship, and in community.

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Over my years as a church going Christian I have seen problems arise when we forget that the church is the body of Christ, and we are meant to look out and care for each other. That means taking the time to listen, to pray, and to help. We also have to be willing to be vulnerable. When a person is struggling whether in a hard marriage, a tenuous work environment, or a changing family dynamic the enemy will always take advantage, and He will always blame.

“Well if he only would….”

“Well, if I don’t get that promotion then I’m out…”

“If she would just listen when I tell her something…”

We suddenly become all about our rights and desires. Is that what God called us to? Or did He call us to trust in Him?

The above verses tell us we will not hunger or thirst. We will not be struck down by the sun by day nor the moon by night (Psalm 121:6). This isn’t just a reference to physical hunger, thirst and discomfort. It applies to every aspect of our being. God cares for every desire and care we have.

We are created in His image. We are able to reason, love, care, act justly, and have compassion. God doesn’t just say He’s going to meet our needs, He does meet our needs and our desires, every single one. When we look back at Isaiah 49:10 it says God has compassion on His people and He will guide them to springs of water.

As we continue to read the passage we hear the Lord say, “I will make all my mountains a road, and my highways will be raised up…” That tells me that God is going to provide a way for those desires to be met. The thing we need to understand is that we are limited where God is not. We see things in a physical dimension, but He works in both the physical and the spiritual.

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4 Delight yourself in the Lord;
And He will give you the desires of your heart.
— Psalm 37:4 (NASB 1995)

Could anything be more simple or sure than the meaning of this verse? If we delight in the Lord, He will give us the desires of our hearts. Every desire we have for love, companionship and affirmation will be lavishly and fully met by our Lord and Savior.

Don’t think this is going to be easy. Verse 13 shows us that we are going to have affliction. There may be seasons where we don’t feel the love. There might be weeks where the blame game seems to work better at every bend and turn. However, what does it say about God? He comforts His people and has compassion on the afflicted. He’s got you. He’s got your desires, every, single one. Our job is to:

Be still and know He is God - Psalm 46:10

Remember we are not condemned - Romans 8:1

Give it all to Him, because He cares for us - 1 Peter 5:7

As we journey into this new year, I hope you will recognize every opportunity to know Him more deeply and that every desire you have will be filled in Him.

The Bee Keeper

This is a fictional work. These are my musings on the work of the Holy Spirit in prayer as written in Romans 8:26 - “In the same way the Spirit also helps our weaknesses; for we do not know how to pray as we should, but the Spirit Himself intercedes for us with groanings to deep for words.”

The man stood in the open watching the light bees streak across the darkening sky. As they fell, their luminescence began to fade. He had to capture them quickly before they went dark. He could still catch them after they fell by listening for their unique buzzing. He darted this way and that, scooping the bees into his sack which began to glow and buzz softly from within.

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“There are a lot of you tonight.” He said it out loud, in part to remind himself of this responsibility the Father had given him.

While the light bees weighed nearly nothing in their glowing state, he knew when he pulled each one from the sack it would weigh heavily on him until he had finished the plea. Each petition was different. Many were not heavy, but more the stuff of wishes and dreams. However, as time passed it seemed that more and more of them were bloated so full of pain and sadness, he often had to go to his brother to ask for help bearing the weight.

When his sack was full, he made his way back to his room. He lay the sack on the table near the window then began to prepare his floor and bed. He always made sure he had plenty of blankets and fluffy pillows. The Father spared no expense for he and his brother, because he had given them the most difficult tasks.

It was an odd conundrum, to be so powerful as to create a world, but to know the depths of pain and suffering because of their love for the creation.

He went to the table and opened the bag. He pulled out the first bee. It was completely dun, but it buzzed softly. He sat on the floor and held it in his clasped hands. Raising his hands to his mouth he blew gently over the bee. The transformation was instantaneous. The bee became light, and sound, and color. It blossomed into whispers, tears and then rants. In that instant he knew for whom he was to pray. In that moment he was driven to his face on the floor where he began to groan and tremble.

There were times, like now, when the prayers were so heavy he could not stand under their weight. The more incoherent the prayer, the heavier it weighed. So many did not know how to pray, not because they lacked the knowledge, but because their hearts were so entangled with the ones they prayed for. Their prayers came out like mumbled, tear filled whisperings, or loud, frustrated, pain filled moans.

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“Lord, God Almighty…my daughter!”

“Creator in heaven…my marriage…help!”

“Father…when…when…when?”

As his heavenly breath breathed over each bee, their rants, moans and tears turned into the purest and sweetest prayers. He knew each and every need, want and desire. He lifted them up, his own body taking the toll of bearing each and every request.

He finished a particularly difficult prayer, his body still trembling from the weight of it. He was sweating, yet chilled. He heard the door open to his room, then felt a gentle hand on his soaked back.

“Brother, your work is heavy tonight. Let me help you bear these dear ones to our Father’s throne.”

He nodded as his brother knelt in front of him. His gentle face was filled with empathy. He knew what it was like to bear this weight. He had born their weight on a rough, wooden cross. He knew them in a way that he was only just beginning to understand.

“Their stings are potent tonight, Brother!”

He smiled. His smile always could light up the world around them. “I am all too aware of their stings, but they do not understand what they ask or what they do. It is in part due to the constraints their flesh puts upon them.”

“But why is it so hard for them to believe, to accept, to have faith? We know our Father is fully good.”

His brother nodded. “We do, but we abide with the Father. It takes them time to grasp the idea that they too can abide with Him…and truly, one day shall abide with us…for those who believe.”

He nodded in agreement. “For those who believe. Thank you, Brother.”

The brothers sat knees to knees cherishing each and every light bee pulled out of the sack. Their unity bore the pain, their brotherhood embraced the hurting, and their love turned all of it into a stream of light and rejoicing, a sacrifice of worship to their Father, the King.

Rejoice Always: A Case Study - Part 3

The last few weeks we have been looking at the idea of rejoicing. To rejoice means to remember the good things, or in our walks as Christ believers to remember how God has blessed us and kept us. We have been looking at the life of Hannah in the Old Testament, the mother of Samuel, prophet of God during the reign of King Saul and King David.

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The last two lessons we looked at the difficult circumstances, Hannah found herself in. While she was dearly loved by her husband, Elkanah, she was unable to have children, and was severely mocked and ridiculed by Elkanah’s other wife, Penninah. Penninah already gave Elkanah children, but she must have noticed his favor for Hannah, thus her constant torment.

We are given insight into Hannah’s despair and her deep desire to have a child. She can’t eat and weeps and prays before the temple, petitioning God to grant her heart’s desire. The priest, Eli, saw her and thought that she had been drinking, to behave in such a distraught manner. He tells her to stop her drinking and get her act together, but Hannah assures him that she had not been drinking, but was distressed and crying out to God in prayer. Eli responds with compassion telling her to go her way and praying that God would grant her petition.

This is where we pick back up.

19 Then they arose early in the morning and worshiped before the Lord, and returned again to their house in Ramah. And Elkanah had relations with Hannah his wife, and the Lord remembered her.
20 It came about in due time, after Hannah had conceived, that she gave birth to a son; and she named him Samuel, saying, “Because I have asked him of the Lord.”
21 Then the man Elkanah went up with all his household to offer to the Lord the yearly sacrifice and pay his vow.
22 But Hannah did not go up, for she said to her husband, “I will not go up until the child is weaned; then I will bring him, that he may appear before the Lord and stay there forever.”
23 Elkanah her husband said to her, “Do what seems best to you. Remain until you have weaned him; only may the Lord confirm His word.” So the woman remained and nursed her son until she weaned him.
24 Now when she had weaned him, she took him up with her, with a three-year-old bull and one ephah of flour and a jug of wine, and brought him to the house of the Lord in Shiloh, although the child was young.
25 Then they slaughtered the bull, and brought the boy to Eli.
26 She said, “Oh, my lord! As your soul lives, my lord, I am the woman who stood here beside you, praying to the Lord.
27 For this boy I prayed, and the Lord has given me my petition which I asked of Him.
28 So I have also dedicated him to the Lord; as long as he lives he is dedicated to the Lord.” And he worshiped the Lord there.
— 1 Samuel 1:19-28 (NASB)

We can learn so much from really scrutinizing this portion of the first chapter of the first book of Samuel. Let’s take a closer look.

The family worshipped together. Verse 19 says they rose early and worshipped before the Lord, before they returned to their home. It is obvious, Elkanah felt being in the house of the Lord was an important part of his life and he saw to it that it was important for his family as well.

Elkanah loved Hannah. We see after they returned to their home in Ramah, Elkanah had relations with Hannah. It doesn’t specify that he had relations with both of his wives, but specifically points out that he had relations with Hannah.

And the Lord remembered her. God does not forget us. He knew us before we were just a tadpole in our mother’s womb. He knows where we are all the time, no matter where we go, or where we might try to hide. (Psalm 139) He also knows the number of the hairs on our heads. (Matthew 10:30) God will not forget us, and He did not forget Hannah.

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Hannah had a child and named him Samuel. (Verse 20) The name Samuel means, asked of God. Indeed, Hannah did ask God for a son and what did she promise God in return if he granted her request? The child would be His to serve Him.

Hannah keeps her commitment to God. Verses 21-28 relay how Hannah kept her promise to God. Once she had Samuel weaned she brought him up to the House of the Lord. Can you imagine, letting your child go? The only child you had, your only son? This is mind blowing to me. We all love our children dearly and I am sure, like me, the thought of losing any of your children for any reason is overwhelming. Now try to imagine, giving that child up willingly at a very young age. I am thinking Samuel might have been three, but maybe older or younger, depending on what age they were weaned at. Imagine taking your three year old to a place that was about a day’s journey away and leaving him in the care of some old guy. What is going on?

I have to wonder at this. Did God give Hannah some sort of knowledge that her son would be fine, in fact would be a very important player in the the Kingdom of Israel? I just think that Hannah had complete trust in the God she believed in. A few months ago I talked about this idea of trust in God. You can see that post here. I am sure it is a topic we will visit again, but for now let’s quickly look at how Hannah trusted God.

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1 - She went to God with her desire. We don’t see Hannah berating her spouse or fighting back with Penninah. Yes, she is emotional, but she takes her heart’s deepest desire to God. Most of us struggle in our relationships. Many times as Christians we think it is okay to talk about our spouses, or partners with our friends, because we have to talk to someone, right? I think this was especially the case when we were newly married and had no idea what we were doing, but I have noticed over the years the maturing process in Christ has led us all to the same place. We are taking our hurts and deepest desires to God first, or at least we should be. I want to keep trying to be like Hannah, because truly it is the best way. God is way better at solving problems and He is bigger too.

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2 - She acknowledged the authority of God. Hannah starts her prayer - “Oh, Lord of hosts…” She knew who God was. She knew what He was capable of. She knew that He was the one with supreme power. Maybe this is where we fall short. We look at Jesus as our friend, our savior, our redeemer, but we forget He is part of the God head that commands the very sun to stay where it is, or the tides to only come so far. He’s tied us to the earth with gravity and formulated the air we breathe using plants and trees. This is the God who is able to do above and beyond all we ask or think (Ephesians 3:20).

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3 - She petitioned God. Hannah didn’t demand anything from God. She simply asked. She also asked with great humility. My husband and I have different styles of prayer when it comes to asking God for something. Most often we are both praying for the same thing, but my spouse often does it in a berserker Viking way, “You said this, now why aren’t you doing it? Come on God, do the God thing.” I typically come to God more timidly, asking if He will do this or that. Now, I have matured in my praying as well. Now I understand the usefulness of praying the scriptures and bringing back to God the promises He gave us. I think God can handle our honesty, however we pray, but it all begins with humility.

4 - She chose to give her heart’s desire back to Him. How often do we pray this sort of prayer, “Lord, if you do this, then I will do that”? Typically, this type of praying is frowned upon, but I think that Hannah was not using it as a bargaining tool, to get God to do what she wanted. She was completely sincere. She really meant what she said, and I don’t know about you, but I am not there yet, but I want to be.

Next time we look at Hannah’s song of thanksgiving. I hope you will join me then for another look at this case study on rejoicing.