A Series of (Un)Fortunate Events - Part 2: The Necessity of Misfortune

Last week I introduced you to A Series of Unfortunate Events, a book series by Lemony Snicket (Daniel Handler) that has also been made into a movie with Jim Carey, and a Netflix series with Neil Patrick Harris. The series follows three orphans, Violet, Klaus, and Sunny Baudelaire, who are trying to find out why their parents died in a fire, while at the same time trying to find a guardian who will love and care for them. The inheritance of their future fortune marks them easy prey for villains wanting their money, specifically Count Olaf.

I made the comparison that often we are like the orphaned Baudelaire’s experiencing one tragedy after another. Misfortune is, as the word’s meaning defines, unfortunate. The word fortunate is defined as - “bringing some good thing, not foreseen as certain; receiving some unexpected good.” Misfortune is defined simply as, “an unhappy situation.” When we call someone unfortunate we are saying they are “marked or accompanied by misfortune.” (Definitions from Webster’s Online Dictionary.)

All of us experience misfortune, but we don’t necessarily see everyone as unfortunate, where every day seems to be a struggle and hope is as elusive as an early morning mist. In fact, when a tragedy happens we will often say, “You were very fortunate. It could have been so much worse.” While this is true, it isn’t always the best thing to say.

If you have been following me for a while, you have probably heard me say that struggles and difficulty are not always all bad. We’ve all heard stories or watched a Hallmark movie, where something beautiful has come out of a terrible situation. In my own life I have seen the hand of God extend mercy in situations where the outcome of people’s choices could have been total tragedy.

Last week I discussed the necessity of Jesus’ departure from earth, so the Holy Spirit could come. Without the Helper’s constant guidance and revelation of God’s word we would be lost. Thus the need to recognize, not all tragedies and difficulties are truly unfortunate. With the Holy Spirit’s help we can recognize four key things about our difficulties.

1 - Allowed by God.

If you believe what the Bible says about God’s characteristics then you must acknowledge His sovereignty. If God is sovereign, all things that come into our lives are sifted through His fingers. We have the book of Job as one for instance of God allowing great difficulty into one man’s life. But, even after all the tragedy, Job knew God was good and sovereign.

He said, “Naked I came from my mother’s womb,
And naked I shall return there.
The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away.
Blessed be the name of the Lord.”
— Job 1:22 (NASB 1995)
9 Then his wife said to him, “Do you still hold fast your integrity? Curse God and die!”
10 But he said to her, “You speak as one of the foolish women speaks. Shall we indeed accept good from God and not accept adversity?” In all this Job did not sin with his lips.
— Job 2:9-10 (NASB 1995)

I can still remember a sermon I heard a few years ago when we were going through an especially hard time. The preacher made two points:

1 - God is sovereign and God loves you.

2 - When you are going through something hard refer back to point number 1.

It sounds pretty simple, but in reality it is. Our Almighty God is not trying to trick us, or manipulate us. He is completely straight forward. His holiness is pure. His goodness is everlasting. His mercies are new every morning. Most importantly, He loves us. Plain and simple.

2 - For our benefit.

Image by Melk Hagelslag from Pixabay

Most of us want things that are beneficial for us whether healthy food and exercise, a place to get away and rest, peace of mind and loving, nurturing relationships. God wants things that are beneficial for us as well. The difference is that as the author of all creation He has a far better grasp of what we truly need.

And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose.
— Romans 8:28 (NASB 1995)

Notice in the verse it says that God causes ALL things to work together for good. It isn’t only the happy, joyful, peaceful things that work for our good, it includes the mind numbing, tragic and ugly parts of life. How can this be the case? Because it is God who is doing the working for the good. We are hardly capable of getting ourselves out of bed in the morning, how is it we are going to know the deep needs of our own selves? We think we do…happiness, peace, no longing, no fear, no confrontation…but we are unwilling to go to the One who knows us inside out.

3 - Meant for God reliance.

A trapeze artist knows the importance of being in excellent shape physically, and mentally. They know their muscles must be strong and their minds must not be distracted by the difficulties of life. In addition, they are completely reliant on their equipment. A broken wire, or rusty chain must be repaired or replaced. How do they know these things? By being taught by others who went before.

When we encounter unfortunate events it is the perfect opportunity to check our relationship with God. Are we maintaining our connection with Him. Are we keeping short accounts on our sin? Are we spending time in His word? Are we searching for scripture and advice on how to get through our difficulties by His strength and with His grace?

I don’t care what the commercials are telling you…be all you can be. I don’t care what the social media influencers are preaching…you are strong, you got this, you are woman hear you roar…most messages that come from a source outside of God Himself, while encouraging are not going to keep you sane when the bottom falls out of your world.

5 Trust in the Lord with all your heart
And do not lean on your own understanding.
6 In all your ways acknowledge Him,
And He will make your paths straight.
7 Do not be wise in your own eyes;
Fear the Lord and turn away from evil.
8 It will be healing to your body
And refreshment to your bones.
— Proverbs 3:5-8 (NASB 1995)
6 Therefore humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt you at the proper time,
7 casting all your anxiety on Him, because He cares for you.
— 1 Peter 5:6-7 (NASB 1995)
63 It is the Spirit who gives life; the flesh profits nothing; the words that I have spoken to you are spirit and are life.
— John 6:63 (NASB 1995)
8 It is better to take refuge in the Lord
Than to trust in man.
— Psalm 118:8 (NASB 1995)
10 ‘Do not fear, for I am with you;
Do not anxiously look about you, for I am your God.
I will strengthen you, surely I will help you,
Surely I will uphold you with My righteous right hand.’
— Isaiah 41:10 (NASB 1995)

We are meant to be God dependent, not independent.

4 - Renewal: God’s best outcome.

Coming through a series of unfortunate events is the perfect time for God to build something new in you. As you practice abiding in Him and relying on Him He will begin to weed that garden that He is cultivating in you. It may be that the misfortunes are actually His way of pulling the weeds of pride, self-centeredness and bitterness from your soul. Let Him be about His work for this will have the best outcome. You will come through your difficulties with a deeper, new found faith and knowledge, not only of who you are, but more importantly of who God is.

And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may prove what the will of God is, that which is good and acceptable and perfect.
— Romans 12:2 (NASB 1995)
Therefore we do not lose heart, but though our outer man is decaying, yet our inner man is being renewed day by day.
— 2 Corinthians 4:16 (NASB 1995)
He saved us, not on the basis of deeds which we have done in righteousness, but according to His mercy, by the washing of regeneration and renewing by the Holy Spirit,
— Titus 3:5 (NASB 1995)

I want to encourage you to remember, you are not alone in your difficulty. There is a loving, omnipotent God working through your series of (un)fortunate events.

When Darkness Comes - Part 9: The Transformative Power of Thanksgiving

We all have heard the old saying that we are to have an attitude of gratitude. Most of us are aware of the difference a mindset of thankfulness can have on our thoughts, emotions and actions.

Nothing is more honorable than a grateful heart.
— Seneca
Gratitude can transform common days into thanksgivings, turn routine jobs into joy, and change ordinary opportunities into blessings
— William Arthur Ward
Gratitude turns what we have into enough.
— Aesop

God’s Word is clear on the importance of giving thanks.

in everything give thanks; for this is the will of God for you in Christ Jesus.
— I Thessalonians 5:18 (NASB)

Just as the Bible commands us to, “Rejoice always” (1 Thessalonians 5:16), and “pray without ceasing” (I Thessalonians 5:17), we are also commanded to give thanks at all times in everything. That means we are to give thanks when the darkness is upon us. We are to give thanks for it, in it and after it has left us. Why is it so important that we thank God when we are in the darkness? Let’s look at a few different reasons.

1 - It places us under His authority.

Image by David Mark from Pixabay

Image by David Mark from Pixabay

The act of remembering who we are and who God is enables us to have perspective. Being thankful places us in our correct standing before Him. Pride, which places us above God, saying we can get through this ourselves and we don’t need anyone’s help, especially His, makes us the authority and not God.

Every person is to be subject to the governing authorities. For there is no authority except from God, and those which exist are established by God.
— Romans 13:1 (NASB)

Knowing there is authority and actually placing ourselves under it are two different things. When we give thanks we recognize God as the one true authority.

2 - It places us under His protection.

protection-442906_1920.jpg
1 One who dwells in the shelter of the Most High
Will lodge in the shadow of the Almighty.
2 I will say to the Lord, “My refuge and my fortress,
My God, in whom I trust!”
3 For it is He who rescues you from the net of the trapper
And from the deadly plague.
4 He will cover you with His pinions,
And under His wings you may take refuge;
His faithfulness is a shield and wall.

5 You will not be afraid of the terror by night,
Or of the arrow that flies by day;
6 Of the plague that [a]stalks in darkness,
Or of the destruction that devastates at noon.
7 A thousand may fall at your side
And ten thousand at your right hand,
But it shall not approach you.
8 You will only look on with your eyes
And see the retaliation against the wicked.
9 For you have made the Lord, my refuge,
The Most High, your dwelling place.
10 No evil will happen to you,
Nor will any plague come near your tent.

11 For He will give His angels orders concerning you,
To protect you in all your ways.
12 On their hands they will lift you up,
So that you do not strike your foot against a stone.
13 You will walk upon the lion and cobra,
You will trample the young lion and the [d]serpent.

14 “Because he has loved Me, I will save him;
I will set him securely on high, because he has known My name.
15 He will call upon Me, and I will answer him;
I will be with him in trouble;
I will rescue him and honor him.
16 I will satisfy him with a long life,
And show him My salvation.”
— Psalm 91

Why does giving thanks place us under His protection? The choice to be thankful requires a shift in our mindset. We know our Unseen Enemy loves to play mind games. If we are teetering on the edge of anger, bitterness, malice, wrath and other bad emotions, we are going to be more susceptible to making choices that are not for our benefit. Dark emotions are part of our sin nature, and very normal, but God does not want us to stay in those murky places. Staying there will result in our undoing.

3 - It lets in the light.

tower-4161416_1920.jpg

Giving thanks is like turning on a flashlight or lighting a candle when you are in a very dark room. When darkness is present in our lives and we are grieving, depressed, struggling, or lost, the choice to thank God allows Him to open the tiniest window into our shadowed world. You might not see the light right away. Often we become accustomed to the darkness and we might even forget what it was like to walk in the light, but light will always pierce the darkness.

When I was going through the dark time I have been sharing with you, I spent three days praying and journaling, most of which I have been sharing with you through these posts. On the last day, the last thing I did was lay before God the reasons I felt the way I did. There is a difference between acknowledging the emotion and knowing why we feel what we are feeling.

Lord, perhaps what would help my sagging spirits is to confess to you all that is making me sad. I am sad...
— Amy's Journal - 5/23/21

I went on to tell Jesus, exactly what I was grieving over: my marriage, my family, relationships, being alone, my imperfections…the list went on. I ended that section with this.

So, I bring it all to You. The desires, the sadness, the disappointment. I bring it to You, and I choose to wait on You. I don’t know what to look for - a miracle? A rescue? A ta da moment? Whatever it is I trust You to bring it about. In the mean time I lean into Your strength and Your courage.”
— Amy's Journal - 5/23/21

However, I did not stop there.

Now I need to give thanks.

I thank You, that the darkness and the light are the same to You.

Thank You, that as You hovered over the darkness of the deep at the beginning of Creation - You are here in my darkness - hovering over, beneath, beside and through.

Thank You, that while I do not have a friend right now to talk to or hang out with, I do have You.

Thank You, that You have shown Yourself to me since I was very young.

Thank You, that no matter what others say, You call me beloved!

Thank You, that I am not condemned, because I am in Christ Jesus.

Thank You, that as I choose to wait on You, You give me strength and courage.
— Amy's Journal - 5/23/21

There was more on that list, and when I finished thanking God, I felt Him say to me, “You done good, now rest.”

Did I feel better? Not really, but I felt as though I had wrestled and wrangled. I wouldn’t realize the sword of the Almighty had pierced me until the next day. I’ll share that next week.

Until then, be thankful. God truly uses all things for our good.

When Darkness Comes - Part 4: Where is God in the Darkness?

I have been doing this series on darkness for the last few weeks. When I talk about darkness, I am referring to those times in our lives when it seems we are under thick cloud cover and cannot see or feel the presence of God in our troubling circumstances. I began the series with a look at the creation of darkness at the beginning. I relayed the idea that to God darkness and light are no different. I also covered the fact that God created darkness for our benefit. Last week I talked about how Satan, through his own pride and arrogance and the temptation of Adam and Eve, caused darkness to take on the characteristic of being bad; of being a covering for evil deeds and sinful people.

Image by Arek Socha from Pixabay

Image by Arek Socha from Pixabay

This week I want to look at where God is in the darkness. Once again, let’s start back at the beginning. You might wonder why I keep going back to Genesis. Genesis is the beginning of all that we know about God, and the history of humanity. I strongly believe if we do not understand the truth at the beginning of scripture, we will not fully understand the rest of it. I know there are Christians who do not believe in a literal six day creation. I do, and I also believe that the rest of our understanding of God, our standing before Him and our need for a Savior will not be complete if we do not trust in a literal creation. That is what I believe. How I study God’s word, and how I present it to you is based off of this foundational stepping stone.

God is Over the Darkness

1 In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth.
2 And the earth was a formless and desolate emptiness, and darkness was over the surface of the deep, and the Spirit of God was hovering over the surface of the waters.
3 Then God said, “Let there be light”; and there was light.
4 God saw that the light was good; and God separated the light from the darkness.
5 God called the light “day,” and the darkness He called “night.” And there was evening and there was morning, one day.
— Genesis 1:1-5 (NASB)
Image by Jakob Boman from Pixabay

Image by Jakob Boman from Pixabay

As we saw in the first post from this series, God was hovering over the surface of the deep. The deep was a darkness; one that could only be plumbed by the Almighty Creator. Even now, with all of our technology, sonars, radars, remote controlled mini submarines, lights and so on, we still cannot plumb the deepest depths of the oceans.

He also bowed the heavens down low, and came down With thick darkness under His feet.
— 2 Samuel 22:10 (NASB)

Once again, we see that God is over the darkness. We might be tempted to think this darkness lies between God and us. We might even wonder if He can hear us through the thick darkness that keeps us from seeing Him, but let’s look further.

God is Within the Darkness

18 And all the people were watching and hearing the thunder and the lightning flashes, and the sound of the trumpet, and the mountain smoking; and when the people saw it all, they trembled and stood at a distance.
19 Then they said to Moses, “Speak to us yourself and we will listen; but do not have God speak to us, or we will die!”
20 However, Moses said to the people, “Do not be afraid; for God has come in order to test you, and in order that the fear of Him may remain with you, so that you will not sin.”
21 So the people stood at a distance, while Moses approached the thick darkness where God was.
— Exodus 20:18-21 (NASB)
Image by jplenio from Pixabay

Image by jplenio from Pixabay

He made darkness canopies around Him,
A mass of waters, thick clouds of the sky.
— 2 Samuel 22:12 (NASB)

These passages clearly state God was in the darkness. In fact, the 2 Samuel verses says the darkness is like a canopy around Him. Since there is no difference to God between dark and light, there is no reason God would not be in the darkness, just as easily as He is in the light. Remember it was Satan’s pride and arrogance and Adam and Eve’s choice to disobey God that turned the darkness into something bad.

I believe there are several reasons, the Almighty wraps Himself in a cloak of darkness.

1 - The glory of God is too much for our eyes to look on. There is one passage in particular that I want to reference, but for the sake of space, I will not put it all here. Exodus 33 gives us much insight into God’s relationship with the people of Israel, but more specifically, with Moses. In verses 7-11 we see Moses regularly going into the tent of meeting, on behalf of the people. There he met with God.

11 So the Lord used to speak to Moses face to face, just as a man speaks to his friend.
— Exodus 33:11 (NASB)
Image by Gordon Johnson from Pixabay

Image by Gordon Johnson from Pixabay

Adam, Noah, Moses and a few others were among those that actually met with God. Adam walked with Him in the garden. Noah did not have the same relationship with God that Adam and Moses had, but he was righteous and heard God’s voice. Moses met with God. Now, we do not know what this looked like, but it does say they spoke face to face, just as a man speaks to a friend. Perhaps this was the face of the Man Jesus. Perhaps it was another form that God took, but it was not God in His glory. If we read further, we can see this distinction.

18 Then Moses said, “Please, show me Your glory!”
19 And He said, “I Myself will make all My goodness pass before you, and will proclaim the name of the Lord before you; and I will be gracious to whom I will be gracious, and will show compassion to whom I will show compassion.”
20 He further said, “You cannot see My face, for mankind shall not see Me and live!”
21 Then the Lord said, “Behold, there is a place by Me, and you shall stand there on the rock;
22 and it will come about, while My glory is passing by, that I will put you in the cleft of the rock and cover you with My hand until I have passed by.
23 Then I will take My hand away and you shall see My back, but My face shall not be seen.”
— Exodus 33:18-23 (NASB)

God wrapped Himself in darkness, because He is too powerful and brilliant for us to look on.

2 - Darkness represents mystery

Just as the ocean depths hold mysteries we have not yet discovered, the darkness surrounding God represents the depths of mystery we have yet to discover about Him. We might think, why does God keep Himself a mystery? Why doesn’t He just reveal everything to us, so that we know Him fully. Look what happened to Adam and Eve when they decided to eat from the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil. With our limited ability and our sinful nature, are we really ready to plumb the depths of an almighty being?

He made known to us the mystery of His will, according to His good pleasure which He set forth in Him,
— Ephesians 1:9 (NASB)

God reveals the mysteries of His layers, according to His good pleasure. I will discuss this further in a future post.

3 - Darkness makes us vulnerable

Image by Free-Photos from Pixabay

Image by Free-Photos from Pixabay

This is the scenario: it is night. The darkness is like a veil hanging over the pathway on which you have to walk. Your flashlight only illuminates the path under your feet. A part of you refuses to shine the flashlight out into the surrounding woods, because you are afraid of what you might see. You walk as quickly as you can from your camp site to the bathroom just on the other side of the woody patch. As you walk your pace quickens turning into a jog. You can feel the darkness closing in around you, but you can see the lights of the bathroom just ahead. You break into a full on run and feel sweet relief when the bathroom door closes behind you. Little did you know, the evil was waiting in one of the stalls.

Obviously, I just made this up, but how many of you have felt this feeling, whether it was in a camp ground after dark in the middle of the night, or walking through your own house searching for the sound you swear you heard when you were laying in bed? Darkness makes us feel vulnerable. When we cannot see what the darkness holds, our minds begin to create all manner of serial killers, monsters and ghosts that might be waiting in those dark shadows.

Why would God then, hide himself within the darkness? Why would He ask for this type of vulnerability? If we study His word we see many of the men and women He used were drawn from positions of vulnerability. Think of Noah (Genesis 6-7): vulnerable to the taunts and ridicule of the evil society around him; Moses (Exodus 2): vulnerable to the threats of Pharaoh; David (1 Samuel 17): vulnerable to a giant named Goliath; Esther (Esther 4-7): vulnerable to her husband the king; Daniel (Daniel 1): vulnerable to the rulers of a foreign land…and of course Jesus, who chose to become a vulnerable human baby.

The darkness reminds us that we are not God. We are weak and lost without Him. Even when we have the light of His word and His spirit within us, we still fall prey to our fear of the darkness and the vulnerability it causes.

God Controls the Darkness

There is one last thing I want to cover in this post. As believers you are probably familiar with the characteristics of God of omnipotence and sovereignty. Omnipotence means all powerful and sovereignty means supreme power. In other words, God is not only all powerful, but all things come through His hands before they come to us.

Image by Darkmoon_Art from Pixabay

Image by Darkmoon_Art from Pixabay

19 Then the angel of God, who had been going before the camp of Israel, moved and went behind them; and the pillar of cloud moved from before them and stood behind them.
20 So it came between the camp of Egypt and the camp of Israel; and there was the cloud along with the darkness, yet it gave light at night. Therefore the one did not approach the other all night.
— Exodus 14:19-20 (NASB)

The people of Israel experienced the movement of God as He protected and led them with a pillar of cloud by day and a pillar of fire by night. The cloud also came along with the darkness. God was able to maneuver the darkness to be where He wanted it to be. He even showed the clouds and the darkness to be a protection for His people.

God is intimately acquainted with the darkness you are going through. He is above it. He is within it. He is in control of it. The problem with darkness is not God, it is us. How we respond to the darkness that comes into our lives will set a precedent for every dark and cloudy day that comes our way.

Next week I am going to begin looking at what our response should be when darkness comes. Be sure to stop by then.

Have a wonderful week.

When Darkness Comes - Part 1: The Light

I think most of us would prefer to travel through life in the light. In this case, light is a metaphor for good things. Most of us would prefer to have an easy road rather than a rough one. Most of us would prefer to not get car jacked by bad things like illness, job loss, broken relationships or the death of a loved one. Those of us who are church goers, would prefer to go to worship, singing and rejoicing in the goodness of the Lord who has led us in the way of prosperity, and perpetual good times, but that is most likely not your reality, nor is it mine.

Image by Darkmoon_Art from Pixabay

Image by Darkmoon_Art from Pixabay

Over the last year we have heard about many who have suffered due to the Covid virus. People have lost time at work, some have lost jobs, others have developed debilitating “long haul” symptoms from the virus, still others have lost loved ones, both young and old. But, before Covid, there were plenty of other things that caused destruction in our world. There have been mass shootings, tsunamis and earthquakes. We are still dealing with diseases like cancer, heart disease and diabetes. In addition things like divorce, rape, child abuse and drug addictions still rise up and destroy individuals and families.

Why? In a world where we have knowledge, medicine, money and plenty of other resources, why do we still struggle with the dark things? Darkness and suffering are part of the fallen world we live in. In the first paragraph I talked about how we all would like to live in the light, but so much of our life is spent in the darkness of shadow. The reasons for this have to do with not only our sin, but His suffering. To understand this idea better, I want to spend this post talking about the light.

1 In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth. 2 Now the earth was formless and empty, darkness was over the surface of the deep, and the Spirit of God was hovering over the waters.

3 And God said, “Let there be light,” and there was light. 4 God saw that the light was good, and he separated the light from the darkness. 5 God called the light “day,” and the darkness he called “night.” And there was evening, and there was morning—the first day.
— Genesis 1:1-5 (NASB)
Image by Pexels from Pixabay

Image by Pexels from Pixabay

When we look at these verses we see there is a progression. First, God made the heavens and the earth. It goes on to say, “the earth was formless and empty, darkness was over the surface of the deep…” Darkness was there at the beginning. Did God create darkness? When we talk about darkness I think we need to look at it from the perspective of what it is not. Darkness is the absence of light.

I want you to notice another detail, “…and the Spirit of God was hovering over the waters.” God was there, in, around, above and below the darkness. God, most certainly could have created a world without being personally involved in it, but He was there. He was, just as the darkness was over the surface of the deep, hovering over that same deep.

Beloved, when you are in darkness, make no mistake, He is there with you. He is personally involved in the depths you are suffering and He will “…never leave you, nor forsake you.” (Joshua 1:5 NASB)

Image by kytalpa from Pixabay

Image by kytalpa from Pixabay

“Let there be light.”

Our God did not end creation there, as much as proponents of the Big Bang Theory would like us to believe. God didn’t just bang the world into existence then walk away and let it “evolve”. He orchestrated its creation, like a conductor leading a complex symphony. You have heard the phrase, the devil is in the details, but not the details of this creation.

It is hard to represent light without showing the darkness around it, or the way the light plays against an object, or reflects off water. Of course, “God is light; in Him there is no darkness at all.” (1 John 1:5 NASB) It is telling to me that God created light first. The interesting thing here is the light was not from the sun, because the sun had not yet been created. In fact, the sun, moon and stars were not created until the fourth day.

Image by ChadoNihi from Pixabay

Image by ChadoNihi from Pixabay

We could question why He created light, but not the things we know give us light at the same time. We might also question, what was this light He created? What was it made out of? What did it look like? Did it have heat, like the sun? I believe everything God does has a purpose. I personally believe that this light was purely His light. The reason this makes sense to me is that it sets up the foundation of our Christian faith, that He is the light and it is only the light of His truth that gives us the ability to see clearly and rightly spiritual things. Just as He knew we, His creation, would need light to live, He also knew, we as bearers of His image would need the light of His revelation to understand our need for Him.

“God saw that the light was good.”

Image by Free-Photos from Pixabay

Image by Free-Photos from Pixabay

We could spend a while just talking about the physical benefits of light. Light helps plants to grown, which in turn creates our oxygen. Light lifts our moods in the dreary winter. Light is essential for good vision; try doing a puzzle in the dark. The very first thing God made, He examined and saw that it was good. Our world would die a slow, agonizing death if we gradually lost the light of the sun.

The fact that God determined the light to be good, also sets a precedent. Aren’t all the things that God makes good? Light is symbolic of our ability to understand Spiritual things. The revelation of God is considered light to our minds and hearts, giving us the ability to discern His truth, His will and His ways.

He came as a witness to testify concerning that light, so that through him all might believe.
— John 1:7 (NASB)
Believe in the light while you have the light, so that you may become children of light.”
— John 12:36 (NASB)
Your word is a lamp for my feet, a light on my path.
— Psalm 119:105 (NASB)

“…and He separated the light from the darkness. God called the light ‘day’ and the darkness He called ‘night’”

Image by Arek Socha from Pixabay

Image by Arek Socha from Pixabay

It was for our benefit God separated the light from the darkness. My imagination wonders what was it like before He made that separation? Were there darkness particles and light particles all mixed up together? Instead of black darkness was it more a gray fog? I am thrilled that one day, I might actually know what it was like at the beginning of our time.

The reality is that darkness and light are all the same to God.

Even the darkness is not dark to You, And the night is as bright as the day. Darkness and light are alike to You.
— Psalm 139:12 (NASB)

I am intrigued by this idea, and it makes perfect sense when we think about it. God sees all and knows all, so why would darkness be a hindrance to Him. We might not like the dark and many of us try to sleep when it is dark, but to God, our darkness is light. As the Psalmist said, “…the night is as bright as the day.”

I want you to hang on to that thought. If you are going through something dark right now, let me reassure you, you are not alone. Many of us are struggling, facing day after day of difficulty, but God is with us. That darkness is not so dark that He can not see us.

Next time we will take a closer look at the darkness and see what God’s word says about what to do when the darkness comes.

My Mind, His Mind

I am taking a break this week from our study of Romans 8, to talk about fear. There is a lot of fear going around right now because of our current circumstances. Knowing there is a sneaky virus out there that could, in fact kill us, is just a bit unnerving. I know many of us are trying to be positive and continue on as if everything is normal, but let’s face it, this is way beyond normal. Not only are there fears over the possibility of contracting COVID19, or someone we know and love getting it, but the economic repercussions are astronomical and I think are going to affect our country for a while.

I know of many people, including our own family who have been affected by the virus economically. Small businesses, like the one my older daughter has are taking a big hit. My younger daughter, who had to make the transition from in class college to all online college, also lost her serving job, which was a big chunk of her income. We are not alone. I know of others, even in health care who have had their hours cut back or have been let go all together, because their specialties are not needed right now. Will everyone have jobs to return to once this is over? Who knows.

What about our country as a whole. We have had it easy for so long and as much as the government says they are going to help with unemployment, stimulus checks and so on, where exactly are they getting all that money from? So many, many questions and we aren’t even past the point yet where we can let our guard down with regards to the actual virus.

So how do we keep from getting overwhelmed? I’d like to share a few things that help me when I am going through tough times. I hope they will help you as well.

Image by Ebowalker from Pixabay 

Image by Ebowalker from Pixabay 

1 - Feel the fear.

God gave us emotions and they are all good, since He is the one who created them. Fear, anger, joy, sadness, all have their place in our lives for us to be healthy individuals. When my father passed away fourteen years ago, I had to go through the grieving process. The best thing to do when encountering emotions we don’t like is allow yourself to feel them. I have used this analogy on the blog before, but think of emotions in terms of a blanket. When you start feeling an emotion like sadness or fear or anger, take that blanket and wrap yourself up in it. Allow yourself to feel afraid, sad or angry. Do this for a few minutes. If it helps, take an actual blanket and wrap yourself up in it. After a few minutes, take the blanket off, fold the blanket up, and move on to the next thing. Think of folding the blanket as if you are packing that fear or sadness away. You can always take it out again later, but allowing yourself to feel it, experience it and then pack it away, helps you to process more volatile emotions in small bits.

Image by Susanne Pälmer from Pixabay 

Image by Susanne Pälmer from Pixabay 

2 - Exercise.

I have noticed a lot more people out walking since the start of Ohio’s shelter in place order. Moms, dads and kids are all out walking trails at the park or just walking the neighborhood. This is so good for us. It not only serves the purpose of getting our heart rates up, it allows us to breath fresh air and get out of the house. I know for many of us, this time of year can be tricky because of the weather. We have rain, gray overcast skies and wind more often than sun and that can make getting out for a walk much more difficult. If that is the case try doing some indoor exercises as a family. Play a vigorous game of Simon Says or follow the leader all through the house.

Image by Kerstin Riemer from Pixabay

Image by Kerstin Riemer from Pixabay

3 - Schedule alone time.

With social distancing in place, this might seem strange, but hello, we are now at home all the time with our kids or with our spouses. If that doesn’t drive you crazy, nothing will. It is especially important if you are an introvert or someone who needs a regular routine. My husband thinks that being home means I am available to talk to, look at something on YouTube or hang out with whenever he wants. That makes it a little difficult for this introvert and writer. I spent the last two days trying to get two writing pieces finished as I had a deadline. I got the job done, but it is definitely harder without a routine.

Mom’s you need that alone time, whether it is to take a long bath, read your Bible or watch a show on Netflix. If dad is home, ask him to hang with the kids so you can have some sanity time.

Image by Peggy Choucair from Pixabay 

Image by Peggy Choucair from Pixabay 

4 - Make memories.

A friend of my daughter’s and mine has been using this time to schedule special events with her kids. She has been sharing her ideas on Facebook and it looks like they are having a blast. She even turned the house into a Cruise ship, complete with boarding passes, dining assignments, entertainment and of course fun foods. What you do with your family during this time has the potential for very good memories, even if it is something as simple as a game night.

Image by Uwe Jacobs from Pixabay 

Image by Uwe Jacobs from Pixabay 

5 - Fill your mind from the right fountain.

Reading article after article about the virus, our economic situation and so on is not good for you. There are plenty of other good things to fill your mind with. Music, books, fun shows, all can keep your spirits up and keep you centered on the positive. Being thankful is a must during this time as well.

I’d like to leave you with an old hymn. I remember singing this song in my classes when I was at Moody Bible Institute in Chicago, IL. Most classes started with a song and a prayer. I had one particular teacher who loved this song and had us sing it quite often. When I came across it the other night, I realized just how perfect it is for our current situation. Enjoy!

May the Mind of Christ My Savior (Lyrics by Katie Barclay Wilkinson, Music A. Cyril Gould)

1

May the mind of Christ my Savior
Live in me from day to day,
By His love and pow’r controlling
  All I do and say.

2

May the Word of Christ dwell richly
In my heart from hour to hour,
So that all may see I triumph
  Only through His pow’r.

3

May the peace of Christ my Savior
Rule my life in every thing,
That I may be calm to comfort
  Sick and sorrowing.

4

May the love of Jesus fill me,
As the waters fill the sea;
Him exalting, self abasing,
  This is victory.

5

May I run the race before me,
Strong and brave to face the foe,
Looking only unto Jesus
  As I onward go.

6

May His beauty rest upon me
As I seek the lost to win,
And may they forget the channel,
  Seeing only Him.

Stopping the Train Wreck

Over the course of the last few weeks I have been looking at how are thoughts can easily sabotage our efforts to form new habits, and be better people. Many of us, when we enter a new year want to reboot. We want to try again to tackle those extra pounds that we have cumulatively put on each holiday season. We want to go at those piles that pervasively appear in each and every room of our house. We want to be better people; more giving, kind and loving. Many of us begin a new regimen of exercise and dieting, clutter control and clearing out, and even invest in pod casts, books and other things to help us think and act differently. Why then, is it so hard to stick to it? Why after a few days, a few weeks, or if your are really good, a few months, do we typically fall off the wagon?

In my post of two weeks ago, When Our Thoughts are a Train Wreck, I examined three mentalities, I believe, contribute to our inability to stick to our new habits. These three thought patterns include being self absorbed, demanding our rights and not caring. I’d like to reexamine these patterns and discuss ways to change our thoughts.

Being self-absorbed

As I mentioned in the original post, taking care of ourselves is not a bad thing. We need to exercise, eat right, get enough sleep and stimulate our minds to give ourselves the best life. Being self-absorbed revolves around a preoccupation with certain ideas about ourselves. These can include thoughts that we do not measure up to some invisible standard that we think other people have set for us, and self-degrading messages like, “I’m too fat,” “I’m not good enough,” which can lead to self-destructive behaviors like cutting, addictions and even suicidal thoughts.

We all have self-absorbed thoughts from time to time. It is easy to get into that mind-set when life is hard and things are not going well. It is also easy to dress in this mind set when your past holds tragedy and pain. However, life cannot be lived to the fullest if we allow those things to imprison us.

I am not a professional counselor, but I’d like to suggest a few things that can help us to get out of the self-absorbed mind-set.

1 - Get Moving

This is partly about exercise and partly about behavior modification. Often when we get into an anxious or self-absorbed circuit, we are unable to get out of the loop. Much like a hamster running on his little wheel, our thoughts keep coming back around to the same loop. We revisit the destructive thought, the let down feeling, the disappointment in ourselves or others and round and round it goes.

Pixabay

Pixabay

It is a well known fact that exercise has good effects on our brains. From increased oxygen flow and release of hormones to antidepressant effects that reduce stress hormones, exercise really is beneficial for the brain. Movement helps to get us out of the loop. It doesn’t have to be rigorous exercise. If you are sitting down, stand up. If you are standing still, move. If you are going north, turn around and go south. Every time those thoughts come creeping back in, move.

Pixabay

Pixabay

I find walking very cathartic, when I am stressed. As I walk I do deep breathing and I purposefully force myself to look at the world around me, the neighborhood, the people, the trees, the snow, the icicles hanging from the roof tops. These simple things get me out of my self-absorbed loop and help me to think about other things. It also reminds me that the world is not coming to an end, even if it may seem like it today. As Scarlet O’Hara said in Gone With the Wind, “Tomorrow is another day.”

Pixabay

Pixabay

2 - Get help

You don’t necessarily need professional help, but if you do, or if others who care about you are recommending it, then do it. Otherwise, find a group of people to keep you accountable. Get an exercise and dieting buddy. Find someone who is going to accept you, but also encourage you to do better. Find an older person, who’s got life experience and ask them to mentor you and help you get out of your self-absorbed box. Or if you are an older person, who doesn’t have much human contact and your are still able to get around, volunteer at a dog shelter, a newborn unit at the hospital or a school. All of these things get us outside our own boxes.

3 - Seek and Speak Truth

You know all those side effects you think you have because you got on the internet and looked up the medication the doctor gave you?

“Stop it!”

In reality, the side effects that are put on medications are put there to keep pharmaceutical companies from getting sued. The reality is the statistics on people who die or have severe reactions to medication are rare. It is an exception, not the norm. The same is true for so many aspects of life. As the saying goes, “Sh-t happens.” This is true, but most of the bad things that we think are going to happen, don’t. In addition, many of the bad things that happen to us we bring upon ourselves. Start researching what is true.

In addition start speaking truth:

“I am not perfect, but I am beautiful.”

“I don’t have a college degree, but I am smart.”

“I haven’t published a book yet, but I am not a failure.”

“I got mad at my husband, but I am a good wife who has bad days.”

“I yelled at my kids, but I am a good mom, even when I my hormones have me off kilter.”

Keep it real.

Demanding Our Rights

Once again, having rights is not a bad thing and an ideal that our founding fathers believed was very important for communities and nations to survive and thrive. However, the thought that the world owes us something is not truthful or beneficial. The mentality of, get it all and get it now, is also not an accurate way to approach life. How do we cope with these entitlement feelings we all have struggled with and still act like a caring, giving individuals?

1 - Walk a Mile in Someone Else’s Shoes

There is no greater preventative to a rights demanding mentality, than to put yourself in someone else’s place. Being in the service industry I have seen people at their best and at their worst. I don’t even think people realize how rude and obnoxious they are at times. I have had helicopter parents demand that their child’s book be given to them free because it wasn’t on the shelf when they came in to purchase it. I have had people accuse me of racism because when I explained the parameters of their rental book I told them they couldn’t spill their lunch on it. I tell this to every individual I rent a book to. At the end of the day, I am just another person trying to make my way in the world, just like everyone else.

When I feel like my rights are being infringed upon, or that I am being taken advantage of, I try to look at things with new glasses; someone else’s glasses. Thinking about where another person is coming from, not only enables us to view the world differently, but it may even move us to have compassion on another person. You never know what another person is dealing with in their life. They might be dealing with deep hurt or disappointment, or they may be experiencing grief, illness or pain. Having compassion and empathy gets us out of our rights loop and enables us to be better, more understanding individuals.

Pixabay

Pixabay

2 - Recognize Rights Mean Responsibility

Having a right, does not give us a free pass to do whatever we want. In fact, having rights, means having responsibility. People who are for the right to bear arms, understand that owning guns means they are responsible to handle those guns safely and teach others that gun ownership requires safe handling and being responsible to use them wisely.

Many people think that demanding rights is a way to guarantee their freedom to choose to do whatever they want. The opposite is, in fact, true. Having rights means we are enslaved to the responsibility of using those rights for good, not merely personal gain.

Pixabay - bread

So what does this have to do with our thought patterns and becoming better people. My daughter and I have both struggled with our weight. We both love food, especially things that are full of carbs. Bread, sweets, chips are all on our radar of things we love. At one point my daughter said she wanted to be able to eat whatever she wanted. You might think that being able to eat whatever you want is true freedom. However, true freedom lies in the ability to make the better choice. Even if we were able to eat whatever we wanted and never gain weight, does that make it right?

True freedom is the ability to not be bound by our appetites, whether it be food, sex, money, popularity, alcohol, Netflix or any other thing that can become an obsession.

To enjoy freedom we have to control ourselves.
— Virginia Wolf

Not Caring

It is easy to get into the mindset of not caring. When life gets busy, or overwhelming, sometimes it is easier to just give up. Who cares if I eat that whole bag of Twizzlers? I don’t care if my coworkers like me? I’m failing that class, so what?

Pixabay

Pixabay

Take a look at a few of these quotes:

Never believe that a few caring people can’t change the world. For, indeed, that’s all who ever have.
— Margaret Mead
Live so that when your children think of fairness, caring, and integrity, they think of you.
— H. Jackson Brown, Jr.
Without a sense of caring, there can be no sense of community.
— Anthony J. D'Angelo

It is important to care. Often, we just need to revisit the why behind the what. In other words, ask yourself why you should care.

Why should you care about your health? Because you are a valuable person who probably has others depending on you and who care about you.

Why should you care what your coworkers think? Because you are part of a team. You can have a positive impact on the people you work with if you care.

Why should you care about your grades at school? Because every choice you make now, will affect the choices you make in the future.

Start thinking about why you should care and maybe that will reignite your ability to care.

Next week will be the final installment in this series on New Year, New Mind. I’ll be looking at setting goals and how to realistically keep them. I will also have some spiritual insights as well. I hope you like this look at renewing our minds. Let me know your thoughts in the comments section below.

Have a fantastic weekend and to all my northern and midwest friends, stay warm!

Just Stop It!

The past two weeks I started looking at how our thoughts have an affect on what we do or don’t do. I wanted to specifically examine this connection since the beginning of a new year is typically when we are trying to get back into shape, form new habits and reset ourselves to do and be better people. I have always felt that it is easy to start something new, but to keep at it is where the difficulty lies. To me it seems that our minds need rebooting as well as our bodies, so that we think differently about the habits and changes we are trying to adapt to.

Last week I looked specifically at three mentalities that most often prevent us from continuing a good thing. I call them Train Wreck Mentalities due to the fact that these mindsets often derail us from embracing a total life change. Being self absorbed, demanding our rights and not caring go a long way in causing us to crash and burn, rather than continue and thrive.

This week I want to give you two little words, but before I do, please watch the following video.

You heard the man. Stop it!

I hope that brought a smile to your face. Let me just say, this is not meant as an insult to people who struggle with mental illness. We know those things are a reality. Anxiety, multiple personality disorder, bipolar disorder, are all very real and most often have to be managed with counseling and medication. There are many of us however, who simply don’t think right and that is where our problems lie.

For as he thinks within himself, so he is. He says to you, “Eat and drink!” But his heart is not with you.
— Proverbs 23:7 (NASB)

This verse actually has to do with a ruler having you to dinner, but then begrudging every bite of food and every drink you take. He is a selfish person, only thinking about the cost of the soiree he is throwing and completely unable to enjoy it. The ruler says to eat and drink, but he doesn’t really mean it.

We are often the same way. We make grand proclamations.

“I’m going to lose 50 pounds.”

“I’m going to exercise 5 days a week.”

“I’m going to work on cleaning out clutter every day.”

“I’m going to become a millionaire by the time I’m 30.”

“i’m going to floss my teeth every night before bed.”

“I’m going to eat healthier.”

Pixabay

Pixabay

We make these proclamations, never really considering how much work and effort it will take to succeed. In reality, we can not succeed if our hearts, like that ruler’s, is not really into it. Here in lies the problem. Our minds can create all sorts of ways to succeed. We can make lists and draw up diagrams of how we are going to get it done, but if our hearts do not agree with our minds, success is going to be long in coming. In fact, if you are anything like me, you will just give up on certain things all together.

So, how exactly do we get our hearts to agree with our heads? The first step is to combat the train wreck mentality. In other words, just stop it!

Let’s first look at train wreck #1 - being self absorbed.

Stop it!

Wow. Wasn’t that simple?

Train wreck #2 - demanding our rights.

Stop it!

Whoo, hoo! See how easy it is.

Train wreck #3 - don’t care.

Stop it! Start caring.

Obviously, if things were really that easy we would all be doing much better and I wouldn’t be writing this post. The struggle is real folks and I am in there with you.

Next week I am going to delve into ways to stop the train wreck mentality, but for now, I want you to burn those two words on your brain…STOP IT.

When you want to give up the good habit your are trying to start; when you want to eat that second bowl of ice cream; when you want to yell at your kids or husband; when you want to bring home another hand bag, pair of shoes or sweater that you don’t need or you don’t really love, then think about those two little words.

Stop it.

Run them over and over in your mind and see if it helps you to make a better choice.

I’d love to hear your thoughts. Leave me your experiences and wisdom in the comments. I appreciate it.






When Our Thoughts are a Train Wreck

Have you given any thought to your thoughts this past week? In last week’s introductory post, New Year, New Mind, I asked you to spend this past week thinking about what you think about. Most often it is our thoughts that sabotage our efforts to make our lives better, whether it be eating better, exercising more, getting rid of clutter, making new habits or just being more thankful or joyful.

I don’t know about you, but my thoughts often look just like this train wreck.

Pixabay

Pixabay

Just how that train got where it got, from where it was coming from, is a mystery, but something definitely went wrong! That is just how our thoughts work. One minute we are fine. We are motivated, energized and raring to go conquer the world. The next moment we are a sobbing, angry, anxious train wreck. This week I would like to look at several areas of train wreck mentality.

Train Wreck #1 - Being Self Absorbed

We are all guilty of being self absorbed. Who hasn’t felt selfish, possessive, jealous or needy? Unfortunately, the train wreck of self absorption is reaching epidemic proportions. Let me break it down:

I’m too - These two little words lead to all sorts of inner focused thinking. I’m too fat. I’m too thin. i’m too tall. I’m too short. I’m too ugly. I’m too young. I’m too old. I’m too dumb. I’m too tired.

In addition to the I’m too problem, there is the parallel Not Enough dilemma.

Not Enough - Not good enough. Not smart enough. Not pretty enough. Not loving enough. Not slim enough. Not organized enough. Not talkative enough. Not brave enough. Not motivated enough….you get the picture. I’m sure, if you are reading this post, you have heard these words in your own head. I certainly have. I have gone over and over the same tracks as the train of self absorption chugs along.

Not a good enough wife.

Not a good enough mother.

Not a good enough grandma.

Not a good enough daughter.

Not a good enough Christian.

Not a good enough employee.

Not a good enough friend.

On and on it chugs along until suddenly it derails and there I am a self absorbed mess.

Have you really thought about how being self absorbed affects you? Not only does it cause physical issues, such as increased heart rate, high blood pressure and auto immune problems, it also causes a plethora of psychological and emotional problems, from anxiety disorder to narcissistic tendencies. Take a look at this interesting article from Psychology Today. While not the definitive authority on psychological disorders and treatments, I think the article makes a pertinent point.

But what’s most fascinating to me here is that I haven’t seen discussed by writers on the subject just how many psychological dysfunctions can be accurately understood as “maladies” of self-absorption. From a variety of phobic, anxiety, and obsessive-compulsive impairments, to many depressive disturbances (including bipolar disorder), to various addictions, to post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), and to most of the personality disorders, self-absorption can be seen as playing a major (if not dominant) role. So any effective treatment of these dysfunctions needs to include significantly reducing these obsessively self-centered—and self-defeating—tendencies.
— Leon Seltzer, PhD., Psychology Today (online) - Posted August 24, 2016

You can see the whole article here.

Our self absorption tendencies may just lead us to a bitter end.

Pixabay

Pixabay

Train Wreck #2 - Demanding Our Rights

This one is a direct outcome of the first train wreck of being self absorbed. Let me say that people should have rights. Our country came into being and was founded on the idea that people should have a right to worship as they want. The men who authored The Declaration of Independence, felt that certain rights were so important, they were willing to go to war to ensure their solidity.

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.
— Declaration of Independence, July 4, 1776

However, the rights that Jefferson, Adams and others were referring too had to do with basic tenants of self-government, including freedom of religion, and the freedom to govern ourselves. When they were talking about government over themselves they weren’t talking about the rights that so many today are yelling about. They were talking about the right to work a job, own a home and yes, to even own a gun. The governing process had to do with community and country as a whole.

Today the rights battle continues as women seek equal pay for equal work, as well as equality on pricing of necessary products such as deodorant and razors. Did you realize that women usually pay more for these products? These desires are good. What becomes a problem is when the demand for rights is born out of a self absorbed mentality.

I want it and I want it now!! Watch this short video.

Isn’t this a perfect analogy of how thoroughly self indulgent we can be. Truly, aren’t we just a bunch of spoiled, rotten, children at times? Demanding our rights, and not taking into consideration the desires, needs and feelings of other people, is not what our forefathers meant when they brought the Declaration of Independence into fruition. A rights based mentality, must be balanced by an equally serious mentality of individual responsibility. An attitude of responsibility means that we cannot be self-absorbed.

Train Wreck #3 - Not Caring

This is probably the mentality that causes the most problems. When we are self absorbed at least we care enough about ourselves that we might still be willing to try to take care of ourselves. We might even be caring enough to care for other people. Demanding our rights means we still want something. We want something that is important enough to us to be willing to yell and fight for it. Unfortunately, when we get to the point where we no longer care, that is when trains derail and we crash.

Think about a time when you gave up, or you wanted to. How did you feel? How did that feeling change the way you were doing things? I have done the, counting calorie thing, many times over the course of my adult life. I have kept track, written things down, measured and tallied. No matter how many times I restarted, I always got to a certain point where I just didn’t care any more. I would lose a few pounds, feel better, fit into my clothes better and so on, but still, somehow or other, I would end back up at the same place.

I don’t care.

I can’t tell you for certain, why we often get to a point of not caring any more, but it does happen. I believe there are many reasons we get to this point in our lives. Fatigue, illness, relationship struggles, work problems, family crisis, national unrest, the list goes on. With our computers, televisions, smart phones and other instantaneous technology, we are constantly plugged in and on the spot. We see what is going on with everyone else and everyone else knows all our struggles as well.

We are finite, limited human beings and eventually all the input does its job of desensitizing us and bring us to that creaky bridge where our train begins to clackety clack across. Finally, the bridge drops out from beneath us and we plunge into the canyon of hopelessness and despair.

Who cares!

Why bother!

I give up!

When we get to this point, it is time to reevaluate how we got here.

Next week I’ll be sharing a video that I hope will make you laugh, but that makes a pertinent point that we can’t ignore and will hopefully give us hope to care again and start living a mentally healthy life.

Until then, have a great week and be careful, not to have a train wreck!

Seasons Come and Seasons Go

We go through seasons in life, just like the earth goes through seasons as it travels around the sun. Spring, summer, fall and winter, all have their presence on the earth, even though they can look quite different depending on where you live. I follow a few fashion bloggers who are based in Australia and it is winter there. It seems odd to see them talk about enjoying their sweaters and heavier weight outfits, even though their pictures still show sunshine and no snow!

Pixabay

Pixabay

Seasons in our lives can manifest themselves differently for each person. When you are a young adult, you might be going to college, checking out the party scene and figuring out what you want to do with your life. I wasn't a partier. I was studious, but I also liked to go out to eat with my friends and walk the streets of Chicago down to Lake Short Boulevard and the beach or State Street and the Gold Coast. That season of my life, helped shape who I am. I met my husband during that season and discovered I was more interested in getting married than in becoming a missionary overseas.

Pixabay

Pixabay

There is an appointed time for everything. And there is a time for every event under heaven—
2 A time to give birth and a time to die;
A time to plant and a time to uproot what is planted.
3 A time to kill and a time to heal;
A time to tear down and a time to build up.
4 A time to weep and a time to laugh;
A time to mourn and a time to dance.
5 A time to throw stones and a time to gather stones;
A time to embrace and a time to shun embracing.
6 A time to search and a time to give up as lost;
A time to keep and a time to throw away.
7 A time to tear apart and a time to sew together;
A time to be silent and a time to speak.
8 A time to love and a time to hate;
A time for war and a time for peace.
— Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 (NASB)

After college, my husband and I got married and it wasn't long until we started a family. I wish when I had been in the throes of that season of life, I would have had an older woman come along side of me and tell me, "This is just a season. Before you know it, in the blink of an eye, your children will be grown and gone. Enjoy it while you can." So often when we are in a particular season of life, we think, "When will this be over? When will it get easier?" The problem with that mind set is that we miss so much. 

Pixabay

Pixabay

The writer of Ecclesiastes was Solomon, considered the wisest king of all time. I think he pretty much summed up the complexity and simplicity of life in those first eight verses of chapter 3. He knew that every season would come to an end and be replaced by another season, which would then be replaced by another season, and so on, and so on.

What season of life do you find yourself in right now? Is is a time of planting or a time of uprooting? Is it a time of laughter or a time of weeping? Or is is a time of being silent or a time of speaking boldly? The inevitability is, the season you now find yourself in will change. How do we handle the seasons we are in and the busyness and difficulties that come with each of those. 

1. Recognize that it is God who changes the seasons.

Then God said, “Let there be lights in the expanse of the heavens to separate the day from the night, and let them be for signs and for seasons and for days and years;
— Genesis 1:14 (NASB)

God, the Creator, is the One who designed the seasons to change. We often think that fall and winter must be a result of the fall, but it says in the above verse that God's intention from the beginning was an earth that changed on a regular basis. So many of us don't like change, but change is a part of God's plan. 

Pixabay

Pixabay

2. Don't be afraid of the changing seasons.

There is plenty to fear in the world we live in. Watch the news on a regular basis and you'll get a boat load of fodder for an anxiety storm. 

For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.
— 2 Timothy 1:7 (NKJV)

I grew up reading the King James Version of the Bible. I decided to use the New King James Version as it is the one most true to the version I memorized. Many versions use the word timidity instead of fear. I am not a Bible scholar so I am not here to argue which version is closer to a word for word translation. I prefer the word fear, because I feel it is closest to what we feel on a regular basis. 

Pixabay

Pixabay

I am preaching to the choir here, friends. I regularly have to combat my fears. I don't think that fear is wrong, but I do believe that dwelling there or as Timothy put it, having a "...spirit of fear..." is not what God wants for us. I am sure the numbers of people in our country who are taking anti-anxiety meds is staggering. Yet, what is anxiety but a fear - fear of failure, fear of being alone, fear of death, fear of illness, fear of any and everything you can imagine. 

It is normal to face fear, when the seasons of our lives are changing. It is scary to face an illness like cancer or the death of a spouse or child. It is terrifying to lose your long time job and have to suddenly be out there looking for a new position in a sea of people in their 20's. Yet, God knows these seasons are changing and as the Psalmist realized, we are precious to Him. 

Keep me as the apple of the eye;
Hide me in the shadow of Your wings
— Psalm 17:8 (NASB)

3. Look for beauty in each season.

Every season that comes and goes has something about it that I love. Spring ushers in new growth, returning birds and an explosion of green. Summer abounds with laughing, playing children, a chorus of lawn mowers and the clinking sounds of glasses filled with iced tea and lemonade. Fall, which is perhaps my favorite, throws an amazing party of color and smells during which the trees undress themselves as they prepare for winters' long sleep. Winter, in areas of snow becomes a white backdrop for red sleds and even redder noses and cheeks. 

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Pixabay

Yes, every season has its difficulties. Spring can be full of torrential rains and often the temps don't climb as high as we would like. Summer can be a time of drought and the ebb and flow of crowds vacationing and squeezing in to fairs and summer festivals. Fall brings early darkness and winter seems akin to the time of the dead, especially for those of us with Seasonal Affective Disorder.

However, just as any transition in life brings change we need to focus on all that is lovely and beautiful, even in the sterility of a hospital room or the stifling sadness of a funeral home. Where else in the world can we get 24 hour quality care? The sadness of loss also brings with it the memories of lives journeyed together and moments of love and laughter. A diagnosis of long term illness allows us the opportunity to stand before our Creator and claim the promises He gave us in His word, that He would never leave us or forsake us and that He would give us peace and strength. 

Beauty exists in the form of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ and He never changes, no matter what season we are in.

4. Have patience.

Remember what Solomon pointed out in those verses? The seasons change. Our lives are in constant flux. Knowing that God is orchestrating our circumstances allows us to lean back on His strong arms and wait for Him to do what He is going to do. The sooner we realize the reality of this next  two verses, the better. 

And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose.
— Romans 8:28 (NASB)
For I am confident of this very thing, that He who began a good work in you will perfect it until the day of Christ Jesus.
— Philippians 1:6 (NASB)

God is at work and will never give up on us! Isn't that amazing? It drives me to my knees to realize that the Almighty God who created us from dust, loves that same said dust to the point of sacrificing His only Son, Jesus, so we might be able to have a relationship with Him.

I don't know what season you are in. I hope it is a season of reaping and praising and planting, but if it is a season of tearing apart, war and great weeping, don't forget He is with you. Always and forever. 

Words from the Past

Every now and then, I like to share something I have learned from someone who is no longer with us. Men such as A.W. Tozer, Andrew Murray, D.L. Moody and others, left behind a treasure chest filled with nuggets of wisdom that God gave to them. Whether it be through their preaching, writing or through others who watched them walk with God, we have access to these nuggets. 

I became a Christian at the age of twelve. Within a few years of that I began writing. I dabbled with stories and poems, but what I wrote most consistently were journals. I have been keeping my thoughts and my prayers in those little lined books for many years. Every now and then, I look back through the pages and it surprises me, how much God has used my writing to teach me about Him and about my place in His world. 

I came across this piece I wrote on September 21, 2012. Since it references fall, I thought it appropriate to publish here for you to read. I was going through a very difficult time in my life at that point and was getting counsel from a godly counselor. We talked about my vision of what I thought life would look like at this point and how in reality things didn't line up. He gently told me that in order to move on, I needed to put that vision to death. 

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Pixabay

At the same time, I was also reading Ann VosKamp's work, One Thousand Gifts, in which she refers to those situations in life that we never wanted or expected as ugly-beautiful. It is amazing how God can bring all these scattered pieces together and give us an acutely clear perspective.

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fall leaves

At times loss can be beautiful - ugly-beautiful.

This season, fall, trees begin a transformation of loss. Their leaves, once green and supple, change in color and become dry, even crispy. 

Gradually, they let go, both the tree and the leaf.

The tree, in its God given wisdom knows that it will bloom again; its stark branches will feel the excitement of new growth.

Does the leaf know its life is over?

Does it accept the loss of the tree and the giddiness of the wind to send it wherever it desires?

Does it breath a sigh of relief when its final resting place slowly swallows it down and it is remembered no more?

There are aspects of my life, I need to let go of. I need to quit clinging and let those leaves fall silently to the ground. 

That is the only way for new life to begin.

(Written by Amy D. Christensen - 9/21, 2012)

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Even though I am at a different point in my life than I was when I wrote that, I believe it still holds true. Don't we all have leaves in our life that we are clinging to, challenging the wind to tear them from us? Yet, each season has a purpose and we need to know when that season has passed and we must let God create newness in our lives. I know it is hard, but God knows what is best and how very much He cares for you.

The Lord appeared to him from afar, saying, “I have loved you with an everlasting love; Therefore I have drawn you with lovingkindness.
— Jeremiah 31:3 (NASB)
For I am confident of this very thing, that He who began a good work in you will perfect it until the day of Christ Jesus
— Philippians 1:6 (NASB)

 

 

The Winds of Change

We all know change is inevitable. With the coming of fall, my mind often turns towards the changes that are beginning to take place. We see the changes all around us in the yellow school buses that are back in traffic, the grass dressed in morning housecoats of dew, plants beginning to wilt and fade and leaves starting their colorful descent towards life's end. Most of us enjoy these changes. Moms with school age children are usually ready to resume the routines associated with their children being back at school. Homeowners look forward to putting away the lawnmowers and trimmers for the long winter season and those of us who love nature look forward to the colorful display of potted mums and changing leaves. 

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Pixabay

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fall

Change can also be very scary.

There, I said it. You know it is true. Many changes are not looked forward to like those I listed above. Change can involve pain, volatile emotions and overwhelming shadows of the unknown. Anyone facing the difficult changes of a divorce, a long term disability or illness or the loss of a loved one, know that change can take on a very different appearance. Instead of looking exciting and enjoyable, change looks lonely and terrifying. So how can we embrace change, even when it is difficult?

Know that God did not intend for things to stay the same.

In our relationship with Christ, God the Father has an ultimate plan, our growth and development as His children. You knew when you had children, the ultimate goal was to nourish and take care of them so they could, ultimately, take care of themselves. Most parents look forward to the day they can see their child go off to college or get married, or move to start a new job. They never intended their children stay with them forever. An attitude like that, would not only be difficult on the marriage, but it would be extremely limiting for the child. They need to grow and become the individuals they were meant to be. 

Therefore if there is any encouragement in Christ, if there is any consolation of love, if there is any fellowship of the Spirit, if any affection and compassion, make my joy complete by being of the same mind, maintaining the same love, united in spirit, intent on one purpose.
— Philippians 2:1-3 (NASB)

God did not intend we stay the same. Life is all about change. Many changes we have absolutely no control over. However, we do have control over ourselves and our attitudes towards those changes. Every time we choose to have the mind of Christ, rather than feeling sorry for ourselves or becoming anxious, we grow and become more like Him.

Know that God is with you through the change.

Going through change can be extremely lonely. I am sure there are times when you are encountering change that you don't feel at liberty to share your burdens with other people. These are the times to remember His is with you. He will never leave you.

Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous! Do not tremble or be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.”
— Joshua 1:9 (NASB)

Did you ever really look at that verse? God commanded...you heard me right. God commanded that Joshua not be afraid, that he be strong and courageous. Isn't He commanding us to do the same thing when our lives are chaotic with change? Because he is with us, we can do it. 

I am the Lord, I have called You in righteousness, I will also hold You by the hand and watch over You...
— Isaiah 42:6(a) (NASB)

Know that God will give you the strength to get through it.

Going through difficult changes can be exhausting, especially if the change has to do with physical distress or limitations. Emotional changes can also leave us feeling drained. Many times when we are encountering change we have a harder time sleeping, eating and just doing the normal every day routine. However, routine is important, especially when your life is in upheaval. Try to wake up at the same time, go to bed at the same time, eat when you need to eat, brush your teeth, get dressed and so on.

I can do all things through Him who strengthens me.
— Philippians 4:13 (NASB)

God is capable. When I get to the point where life just won't let up, I find myself returning to this verse in Philippians over and over. I claim it. I bring my fatigue and distress to the Lord and simply say, "Lord, your word says, 'I can do all things through Him who strengthens me.' I claim that promise now and trust You to give me the strength I need to keep going." You know what? He has never failed me. He always gives me the strength to get through the changes that are going on in my ever rocking world. 

That strength may not always be physical. You might be flat on your back in the hospital, but He will give you the strength mentally and emotionally to deal with those changes. Remember, it is all about Him. He will give you strength because He is the one who will be glorified as you get through the winds of change.