Leaning In - Getting Back to Basics when Life is in Upheaval - Part 1: A Personal Journal Entry
The following account is taken from one of my own personal prayer journal entries. It is in the fires of upheaval that God does His refining work. For me to rant and rave against that work does not benefit, but when I come to Him with sincerity and a searching heart He uses that refiners fire to bring me into an ever deeper and more joyful relationship with Him. A good friend used to say, “God knows what He’s about.” How true that is. “For now we see in a mirror dimly, but then face to face; now I know in part, but then I will know fully just as I also have been fully known.” I Corinthians 13:12.
Image by Franz P. Sauerteig from Pixabay
(Pieces used in this journal entry came from a short video by Alistair Begg which you can view here, and from an article by A.B. Simpson, founder of the Christian and Missionary Alliance, titled Himself. You can read that by clicking on the link.)
May 6, 2026
Lord, my God, my Savior, my King; You are an amazing God. You are the only, One True God. You are above all. You are the One True King; the One True Lord. You are the Creator of all that lives and of all that keeps us living. You are the Creator of the universe. How amazing You are. How good Your works are. How beautiful is Your Word. How holy is the Triune God; the Ternion in Sole - Father, Son and Holy Spirit.
You have continually provided. Thank you for the provision of all things needed for life and godliness…through the true knowledge of You, who called us by Your glory and excellence; for by these You have granted to me Your precious and magnificent promises, so that by them I might become a partaker of Your divine nature. ( 2 Peter 1:1-4) Wow!
Lord, I certainly do not feel that I have been living as a partaker of Your divine nature. I have been struggling for months: physically, mentally, emotionally. If I partake in Your divine nature should this be so?
You gave me two things to look at this morning: Himself by A.B. Simpson, and the short take by Alistair Begg on Proverbs 24:10. Both seem to be redirecting me back to You. It is You who work and move in the world and in our lives. (Philippians 2:13)
“I have been crucified with Christ; and it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself up for me.”
It is no longer I who live…but You live in me. I believe this to be true, but lately grief, loss, illness, and sadness have left me feeling empty. I know, you are still there, still in me; You will never leave me or forsake me (Hebrews 13:5-6). Why then, do I feel this nothingness?
“Never mind, my child, you have nothing. But I am perfect power; I am perfect love; I am faith; I am your life. I am the preparation for the blessing, and then I am the blessing too. I am all within and without and all forever.””
Lord, what does this mean? How am I to live? How am I to move forward? I feel so tired…exhausted…
“Come to me!” (Matthew 11:28-30)
I am trying to do that now. I come to You and lay my burdens at Your feet.
Image by Edward Lich from Pixabay
“I will make known to you the path of life; in My presence is fullness of joy; in my right hand are pleasures forever.” (Psalm 16:11)
“For of His fullness we have all received, and grace upon grace.”
Lord, these words, Your words, are reminding me, once again that all of life is in You; all I need and want is in You; that fullness of both God the Father, and the Holy Spirit combined with the fully Man; all of that fullness is mine to partake of, to learn from, to be comforted by, to be led by, to be loved by; to lean into, to know deeper and deeper.
Lord, don’t let me go. Don’t let my mind, heart, soul or body ever forget that in You is all the fullness of the God-head bodily, and You are all and everything I need for life and godliness.
Lord, you see my shortcomings, my sins, my coping mechanisms, which all pale in comparison to You. Help me out of the hole I am in. Raise me from the dead!
In Jesus’ precious name, and by His shed blood, Amen.