No Condemnation

I’ve been mulling over what I should focus on in my life as a Christian. There are so many areas where I need to improve or, as I talked about last week, have some discipline. The unfortunate reality is, we can talk all we want about making changes, doing better, being better, but if we don’t actually do it, then where are we? We find ourselves like that noisy gong or clanging cymbal mentioned in I Corinthians 13.

If I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, but do not have love, I have become a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal.
— I Corinthians 13:1 (NASB)
Image by Hans Braxmeier from Pixabay

Image by Hans Braxmeier from Pixabay

Right now, I feel as though God is impressing on me, once again, the importance of prayer. A few weeks ago I had a devastating dream about my younger daughter. In the dream she had died, yet I could see her and it was like she was talking to me. She told me she had cancer and she hadn’t wanted anyone to know. She wanted to die alone, so no one would be grieving over her as she died. It was devastating. I woke up and kept reassuring myself, it was only a dream. Unfortunately, the reality is, many young people we know are not following after Christ. They have bought into the lord of this age and the lies he spins. It was from the despair I felt over the aloneness of my girl that I realized we are losing many of our kids, because we have become overwhelmed with life. At least I have.

I don’t even like to admit this, but I am a failure at prayer. I’m not talking about the daily conversations we have with God; the prayers of thanks, the whispers of panic, the lifting our hands in the air because we don’t know how to pray, prayers. The type of prayer I am talking about is the down on our knees, face in the carpet prayers. I fail at the real spiritual battle prayers. These are the kind of prayers that we need to be praying.

We live in a world where we don’t want to make waves. We talk about kindness, acceptance and love. We want to give and receive acceptance and tolerance. As Christians we have become milk toast; soggy, damp and unappealing. Think about what it is that draws men to Christ. It comes from a heart desperate for meaning and one that recognizes there is a darkness within, wanting to swallow us up, from the inside out. The call of Christ is heard by those who realize there is nothing else, and no one else, who can give life and life more abundantly.

Image by reneebigelow from Pixabay

Image by reneebigelow from Pixabay

What then, is it going to take to get me to pray for the people who need His salvation, as desperately as the one who realizes their need to finally give their lives over to Christ?

Over the next few weeks I want to take a look at Romans chapter 8. I feel this ties into, not only the idea of prayer, but the need for discipline discussed last week. I will approach this study in a similar fashion to my Mulling It Over series, as that is what we will be doing as we look more closely at the chapter.

To see the entire text just click on this link to BibleGateway. com, Romans 8 (I will be using the New American Standard version of the text for most of the discussion).

Therefore there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.
— Romans 8:1 (NASB)

Out of the entirety of the Bible, this is perhaps one of my favorite verses. There are many other verses I love, such as John 3:16 - salvation in a nut shell, Philippians 4:6-8 - promises against anxiety, Jeremiah 29:11 - His plans are for my welfare, and many, many others. However, this verse is so declarative about my relationship and place in Christ, that when the gnawing feeling of being “less than” returns, I quote this verse and am immediately reminded of my place in Him.

In order for us to getting a running start at this verse and this passage, we need to back up and take a look at some of the verses in chapter 7.

14 For we know that the Law is spiritual, but I am of flesh, sold into bondage to sin.
15 For what I am doing, I do not understand; for I am not practicing what I would like to do, but I am doing the very thing I hate.
16 But if I do the very thing I do not want to do, I agree with the Law, confessing that the Law is good.
17 So now, no longer am I the one doing it, but sin which dwells in me.
18 For I know that nothing good dwells in me, that is, in my flesh; for the willing is present in me, but the doing of the good is not.
19 For the good that I want, I do not do, but I practice the very evil that I do not want.
20 But if I am doing the very thing I do not want, I am no longer the one doing it, but sin which dwells in me.
21 I find then the principle that evil is present in me, the one who wants to do good.
22 For I joyfully concur with the law of God in the inner man,
23 but I see a different law in the members of my body, waging war against the law of my mind and making me a prisoner of the law of sin which is in my members.
24 Wretched man that I am! Who will set me free from the body of this death?
25 Thanks be to God through Jesus Christ our Lord! So then, on the one hand I myself with my mind am serving the law of God, but on the other, with my flesh the law of sin.
— Romans 7:14-25 (NASB)

It is as if the Apostle Paul was walking a mile or two in my shoes. Obviously, this is applicable to all of us as human beings. We wage war in our flesh. We want to do what is right or good or even good for us, yet our flesh is unwilling and battles against all that is good. I concur with Paul, “Wretched man that I am! Who will set me free from the body of this death? Thanks be to God through Jesus Christ our Lord! So then, on the one hand I myself with my mind am serving the law of God, but on the other, with my flesh the law of sin.”

Those two verses really sum up how I feel. I want to pray. I want to do what is good. I want to be healthier. I want to eat better. I want to exercise more. I want to be the best wife I can. I want to be the best mom and grandma I can. I want to be the best Christian I can! BUT, I regularly, miserably fail. That leads us to Chapter 8.

I find, what really gets me derailed from successfully having self-control, and being disciplined is the condemnation I feel when I don’t succeed. I messed up, oh well, guess I’ll just eat that bag of chips. It’s too hard to pray, so I guess I won’t even try. Where does that lead? You got it, down a trail of guilt. Guilt often spirals out of control until we no longer even want to do the things that are right or good.

However, that guilt is not coming from our Lord. Verse 1 of chapter 8 makes that clear. It says there is NO condemnation. Yes, we are convicted by the Holy Spirit when we sin. That voice does not condemn, it reminds and renews. The condemning voice of the enemy discourages and limits. Remember that. Jesus will remind us of what is right and He will give us hope. The enemy will never give us hope. He will always leave us feeling that we lack, and that is precisely why we fail.

We think that we are in this alone. We think that it is in our strength that we are supposed to do all those things that require discipline and self-control, but self-control is a fruit of the Spirit, not something we conjure up out of our own abilities. We fail, because we do not go to Him for the strength and ability to do the things He wants us to do.

Image by walkersalmanac from Pixabay

Image by walkersalmanac from Pixabay

We will dig deeper into Romans 8 next week, but until then, memorize Romans 8:1 and use it like a sword, every time the enemy make you feel hopeless, lacking and like a failure, because if you are in Jesus you are not condemned.



Realistically Setting Goals

This is the final installment in my series on New Year, New Mind. I’ve been discussing how our thoughts can easily derail our efforts to form habits that will make us healthier people, not only physically, but mentally and emotionally. Last week I looked at a few ways to stop our train wreck mentalities and this week, I wanted to close with a look at realistically setting goals.

Pixabay

Pixabay

Baby Steps

The best way to start when setting goals is by starting with small steps. Rather than starting large and working your way back, start small and work your way up.

For example, if you want to get organized, but don’t know where to start, decide what your first priority is. If you need to work on meal planning, start by having a plan for at least three meals a week. Rather than being overwhelmed with a whole week, just plan a few and write them down. If you and your spouse both work and can afford the service, there are a number of food services now available that deliver all the ingredients and directions for meal prep to your door for as many meals a week as you want. My daughter and her husband use Blue Apron and have three meals a week delivered. All they have to do is open the box, take out the ingredients and follow the directions. There are lots of options available.

Perhaps you want to improve your health by exercising, and eating better. Instead of going cold turkey off all your favorite treats, start with a few small changes. Drinking more water, adding a veggie at lunch or a fruit at breakfast, eating one less meal out a week, or measuring out the potato chips so you only get one serving are all good baby steps to a healthier lifestyle. If you don’t want to invest the time or money in a gym membership there are plenty of videos on youtube.com . You can find pretty much anything to suit your lifestyle from short 20 minute walking videos to longer cardio to yoga and stretching.

Starting small allows you to see success quickly and will keep you from getting discouraged that you aren’t seeing results right away. Each step you take towards achieving a goal, is a step in the right direction, even if it is only a baby step.

Get Organized

This could be a problem, if one of your goals is to get organized. Ha, ha. I personally struggle with organization, not because I am incapable of being organized, but because I allow life to overwhelm me. Busyness, and fatigue have put a dent in my organizational capabilities. However, I know that being more organized will help with the busyness and chaos of life. Over the course of time I have come to see the following habits help life run more smoothly.

Meal plan. Planning out a weeks worth of meals help when you are grocery shopping, and when you are trying to figure out what to make for dinner. I used to do this more frequently when my girls were young and keep trying to get back to it. It saves money, time and your sanity when life gets busy. Meal planning is also helpful, when you are trying to lose weight.

Pixabay

Pixabay

Get up earlier. I know this is very hard for some people. I am a morning person and have the most energy before lunch. My hubby on the other hand could well be diagnosed with morning sickness. He abhors morning. Getting up earlier, gives you more time to get exercise, read your Bible, meditate and just get ready for the day ahead. This is especially important when you work and you have to get lunches made and help others get their days started as well. Start small, taking a baby step in that direction by getting up 15 minutes earlier. Gradually you might be able to work up to a half hour or more.

Pixabay

Pixabay

Invest in a good planner. I am a geek, so I love being able to get a new planner every year. If you get one with lots of spaces, you can use it for many purposes. You can put your meal planning in there, your appointments, work schedule and so on. A planner is a great way to keep you organized, the trick is to actually write things down in it. Ha, ha. I speak from experience!

Pixabay

Pixabay

Getting organized in the normal routines of life and finishing little projects you’ve started is an important first step toward realizing larger goals. If you can’t get a handle on the small things, how will you ever get it together to focus on the big things?
— Joyce Meyer

Have a Plan

I have found the thing that helps me most in achieving my goals is to have some sort of a plan. It doesn’t have to be written in stone and signed in blood, because, let’s face it, real life often interferes with our plans. A plan that has some amount of flex to it is probably the best way to approach goal setting that will succeed.

For instance, when I want to lose weight, I come up with a plan. I decide on a way to keep track of my calories, because i have found calorie counting the best thing for me. It holds me accountable and lets me see my progress. I download a fitness app on my phone. I use a combination of Fitbit and MyFitnessPal. I also try to do more meal planning. As I said earlier, meal planning makes it easier to keep to a daily calorie goal.

Having a plan for any area of goal setting will help you succeed. Whether you make a daily plan, like keeping a list of things to do, or a weekly plan such as exercising three times or a monthly plan like getting rid of 10 items I no longer use, planning will produce results much more readily than no plan at all.

Here are a few questions to ask yourself as you develop a plan:

What do I want to accomplish?

When do I want to accomplish this by?

How am I going to accomplish this?

What sort of resources do I need to invest in to accomplish this goal?

How will I handle failure?

That question leads me to my last point.

Handle Failure Positively

Failing at anything is hard. We live in a society that condemns failure and honors success. Obviously, success is the goal. We want to be successful at whatever goals we have, but the truth is that failure is inevitable. If your goal is to lose weight, you will fall off the wagon. You’ll have a bad day and give in to those cravings for ice cream. When your goal is to declutter because you have been binge watching Tidying Up with Marie Kondo, you will end up at the mall scouring the sale racks at your favorite store, because things are marked down to less than five dollars. Maybe your goal is to be more patient with your family. Be assured they will push all your buttons before the day is over. This is real life.

One of my faithful subscribers said it best:

...instead of letting a day, or even a couple weeks, of a blown resolution or new effort derail us or cause us to give up completely, why not get up and get started again. Keep moving forward.
— Karen - SGM subscriber

We all need to hear things like this and this leads me to several thoughts about failure.

Failure thrives on Fear

Fear is perhaps one of the biggest factors in keeping us from getting back up and starting over when we have failed.

“I can’t do it. If I try, I’ll only fail again.”

Sound familiar? Stop being afraid. Failure is not your master! Many who have gone before us recognized this fact.

Failure is simply the opportunity to begin again, this time more intelligently.
— Henry Ford
Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts.
— Winston Chruchill
I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.
— Thomas A. Edison
You build on failure. You use it as a stepping stone. Close the door on the past. You don’t try to forget the mistakes, but you don’t dwell on it. You don’t let it have any of your energy, or any of your time, or any of your space.
— Johnny Cash

I could go on with amazing quotes from amazing people who went toe to toe with failure. Reading these encouraged my heart and I hope they do for you to. Failure is but a stepping stone to achieving the goals we have set. Start believing that.

Failure abhors Friendship

Have you ever noticed when we fail, we want to be alone in our misery and throw ourselves a little pity party? Surrounding ourselves with good friends can turn failure into fuel. As I stated early, I have several subscribers that often comment on my posts, sharing their enthusiasm for fashion or their struggles as they walk the road of life and faith. This means so much to me and gives me fuel to keep going, to keep trying, even when I fail.

You don’t have to have a boat load of friends to be fueled by your failure. One good friend, or your spouse can be the one to reach down when you have fallen to help you back up. If your support system is limited go to Jesus. I have certain scriptures I return to again and again, like old friends, when I need encouragement or help getting back up.

Therefore there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.
— Romans 8:1 (NASB)
For I am confident of this very thing, that He who began a good work in you will perfect it until the day of Christ Jesus.
— Philippians 1:6 (NASB)
But He knows the way I take; When He has tried me, I shall come forth as gold.
— Job 23:10 (NASB)
Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous! Do not tremble or be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.”
— Joshua 1:9 (NASB)

I hope this series on changing our thoughts has been helpful to you. The things I have written about in this series are just my opinions. I am not a licensed counselor, just a woman who has dealt with the failure mind set in my own life. I write as much to myself as to you, so I hope this was helpful.

Have a wonderful weekend and let me know your thoughts in the comments.