Creative Christianity - The Widow's Quest: Part 1

The following piece begins a series based on the passage found in Luke 18:1-8. It presents a fictional account with allegorical aspects which coincide with the parable told by Jesus in those Scriptures. This is a fictional story with a world, and characters built by me. I hope you enjoy it.

Constance made her way through the narrow, muddy streets, thankful it was raining. A constant downpour washed away some of the surface filth making her feel there was a modicum of cleanliness here in the Rift. She kept her head down, the hood of her coat concealing her face. She didn’t want anyone to know where she was going. If they found out she was on her way to the Manor of Minward they would beat her until she was no longer recognizable. The Black Needles didn’t appreciate the people of their ward asking for help. They didn’t need help. They could make it on their own.

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Constance smirked beneath her hood. Neoplo “The Builder” De Caro wasn’t just known for building the run down, decaying ruins the people of the Rift had to live in, but for raising up the crime syndicate that preyed on the very people it was supposed to protect. She had seen enough; enough suffering; enough struggle; enough darkness. If the Lord of Minward was truly just, as she had often heard through her fourty-three years, why didn’t anything change? She was going to find out.

She was going to have to get past a few of De Caro’s check points. He wasn’t fond of people leaving his barony. He had an intricate web of knowledge woven together by his army of groveling lackeys. Constance learned from the time she was very young to blend in. She didn’t want to stand out. Being noticed by Neopolo, meant you became one of his, either that, or you conveniently disappeared. She felt bad for the younger people. De Caro’s appetite wasn’t just reserved for food and drink.

Constance felt bile rise in her throat, but she swallowed it, and clenched her fists. She wasn’t going to become just another of De Caro’s appetizers. She had to have hope; hope that the Lord of Minward would be able to make a change. Maybe he just wasn’t aware of how bad it was in the Rift. As the Lord of an entire city, he must be very busy, and maybe information wasn’t getting through due to De Caro’s influence.

The first check point loomed ahead. Her training in boiler maintenance should be able to get her through this one. She felt the tool bag by her side, then slid her hand into her coat pocket where the forged work papers printed on union stationary, and folded neatly, stayed dry from the down pour.

Image by Anna Veronika from Pixabay

Constance wasn’t alone in this quest. There were a few others who wanted a better life, and knew De Caro’s empire building wasn’t going to benefit them. She and Amos had formed a small group of other “believers”, which now was up to twenty members. They rarely all met together, but stayed in touch using messages sent via trusted couriers. Since the steam movement, and its subsequent advancements in communications, things like sending handwritten messages on foot had become obsolete. Now things were moved along through vast tubular networks both above and below ground pushed along by the compressed power of steam.

Amos had been like a little boy, completely enamored with the advent of the new Steam Era. He loved the machines, the gears, the noise and the power behind something so simple as heated water. She missed him terribly. It was coming up on five years since his death, but grief was relentless where darkness bred, and the Rift was a breeding ground for all that was dank, and miserable.

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Constance took a deep breath and moved confidently to the first check point. Each check point held a small booth barely big enough for one person, but often occupied by several of Neoplo’s goons. There were three of them in this one. They were chatting and laughing. There were several other people in line.

When her turn came, Constance pulled the papers out of her pocket and quickly shoved them through the small opening in the window.

The man looked down on her, from where he sat in the dry, heated booth.

“You in a hurry there, lass?”

Constance wanted to quip back she was old enough to be his mother, but didn’t reply, just shrugged. She found the best thing to do was not engage. Once you started talking, they became interested. She waited, turning to look at the line that was forming behind her. That was a good thing. The more people waiting, the less time they would take to push you through.

The man stamped her papers and passed them back through the window. As she reached to take them, he wouldn’t let go. She looked up at his scruffy face.

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“Smile, Sunshine. Life ain’t so bad. Doesn’t old De Caro take good care of his people?”

Constance swallowed the retort brewing in her gut, gave a shy smile and nodded her head.

“There we go! You have a good night now, lass!”

Constance placed the papers back in her coat pocket. As she walked away she let out a deep breath. One more check point to go.

The Bee Keeper

This is a fictional work. These are my musings on the work of the Holy Spirit in prayer as written in Romans 8:26 - “In the same way the Spirit also helps our weaknesses; for we do not know how to pray as we should, but the Spirit Himself intercedes for us with groanings to deep for words.”

The man stood in the open watching the light bees streak across the darkening sky. As they fell, their luminescence began to fade. He had to capture them quickly before they went dark. He could still catch them after they fell by listening for their unique buzzing. He darted this way and that, scooping the bees into his sack which began to glow and buzz softly from within.

Image by Oscar Portan from Pixabay

“There are a lot of you tonight.” He said it out loud, in part to remind himself of this responsibility the Father had given him.

While the light bees weighed nearly nothing in their glowing state, he knew when he pulled each one from the sack it would weigh heavily on him until he had finished the plea. Each petition was different. Many were not heavy, but more the stuff of wishes and dreams. However, as time passed it seemed that more and more of them were bloated so full of pain and sadness, he often had to go to his brother to ask for help bearing the weight.

When his sack was full, he made his way back to his room. He lay the sack on the table near the window then began to prepare his floor and bed. He always made sure he had plenty of blankets and fluffy pillows. The Father spared no expense for he and his brother, because he had given them the most difficult tasks.

Image by David Greenwood-Haigh from Pixabay

It was an odd conundrum, to be so powerful as to create a world, but to know the depths of pain and suffering because of their love for the creation.

He went to the table and opened the bag. He pulled out the first bee. It was completely dun, but it buzzed softly. He sat on the floor and held it in his clasped hands. Raising his hands to his mouth he blew gently over the bee. The transformation was instantaneous. The bee became light, and sound, and color. It blossomed into whispers, tears and then rants. In that instant he knew for whom he was to pray. In that moment he was driven to his face on the floor where he began to groan and tremble.

There were times, like now, when the prayers were so heavy he could not stand under their weight. The more incoherent the prayer, the heavier it weighed. So many did not know how to pray, not because they lacked the knowledge, but because their hearts were so entangled with the ones they prayed for. Their prayers came out like mumbled, tear filled whisperings, or loud, frustrated, pain filled moans.

Image by Rebecca Martell from Pixabay

“Lord, God Almighty…my daughter!”

“Creator in heaven…my marriage…help!”

“Father…when…when…when?”

As his heavenly breath breathed over each bee, their rants, moans and tears turned into the purest and sweetest prayers. He knew each and every need, want and desire. He lifted them up, his own body taking the toll of bearing each and every request.

He finished a particularly difficult prayer, his body still trembling from the weight of it. He was sweating, yet chilled. He heard the door open to his room, then felt a gentle hand on his soaked back.

“Brother, your work is heavy tonight. Let me help you bear these dear ones to our Father’s throne.”

He nodded as his brother knelt in front of him. His gentle face was filled with empathy. He knew what it was like to bear this weight. He had born their weight on a rough, wooden cross. He knew them in a way that he was only just beginning to understand.

“Their stings are potent tonight, Brother!”

He smiled. His smile always could light up the world around them. “I am all too aware of their stings, but they do not understand what they ask or what they do. It is in part due to the constraints their flesh puts upon them.”

“But why is it so hard for them to believe, to accept, to have faith? We know our Father is fully good.”

His brother nodded. “We do, but we abide with the Father. It takes them time to grasp the idea that they too can abide with Him…and truly, one day shall abide with us…for those who believe.”

He nodded in agreement. “For those who believe. Thank you, Brother.”

The brothers sat knees to knees cherishing each and every light bee pulled out of the sack. Their unity bore the pain, their brotherhood embraced the hurting, and their love turned all of it into a stream of light and rejoicing, a sacrifice of worship to their Father, the King.

Relentless - Part 6: Home

Laney, could hear the steady beep, beep, beep of the machine monitoring her heart. She knew where she was, and what was going on. She was dying, but an amazing peace surrounded her, a living, breathing presence. She thought back to all those years ago, the night Steve walked out on her; the night the Shadowed Ones tried to get her to take her life; the night she met her unborn daughter. That night she had given her heart back to its maker; the King.

Image by OsloMetX from Pixabay

“GG?” A sweet, young voice called her name and she could feel the tender hand on her own. She opened her eyes.

Her youngest great grandchild stood next to her hospital bed. He was only eight, but his faith in the King was as strong and as deep as a mighty tree. She smiled at him.

“Silas.” Her voice came out in a raspy whisper.

“GG? Are you going to see Him? Are you going to see the King?” His eyes were wide with hopeful, childlike anticipation.

Laney managed a nod. “Yes, sweetheart. Yes I am.”

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Laney turned her head and saw the room filled with her family. She could see Steve in every single one of them. The thought made her smile. Steve hadn’t really given up on her, just like the King and His Son, he relentlessly pursued her.

For a long time she carried the guilt of her abortion, and it made seeing Steve even harder, but gradually, time, and the King’s soothing words reminded her she was forgiven. She was made new, and nothing ever captured her attention again, like His love.

Silas squeezed her hand. “GG, when you get there can you tell Gpa I miss him? Can you also say hi to Cocoa, and Nut?”

Laney managed a soft chuckle as she thought about the last two dogs she and Steve had rescued. The grandkids had been a little older than Silas when they adopted a dark brown puppy from a puppy mill, and a fluffy, white, very busy puppy from the Humane Society.

Image by carpenter844 from Pixabay

“Silas, I will tell them, and I’ll tell Myles, Sophie, Frito, and Chip.”

Silas’ brow wrinkled. “Were those your doggies when you were younger?”

“Oh, yes, Silas. Myles and Sophie were the dogs who helped rescue me. Frito and Chip were your dad and Aunt Evi’s dogs as they grew up.”

Steven Jr. stepped forward and put his hands gently on Silas’ shoulders. “Come on, bud. We need to let Gram rest.”

Silas squeezed her hand one more time then let his father lead him a way from the bed. Laney looked at all of the blessings the King had given her. His grace and mercy showed in every single face that stood in that room.

She lifted her hand towards her son. “Steven, come.”

Steven stepped to the bed and put his arm around his mother lifting her so she could see everyone.

“I love every single one of you, and I know you love me. You all know my story, because I never want you to go down the road I did…to run away from the King. No matter what happens in your lives, only He is truly trustworthy, and loves you completely. He alone makes you exactly who you are supposed to be. Always remember.”

Laney leaned back weakly on her son’s arm, and he gently placed her head on the pillow. “Good bye, Mom. We’ll see you again.”

Her daughter, Evi, came over and kissed Laney’s forehead, her tears anointing her mother for her last journey.

Laney closed her eyes.

* * * * * * * * *

When Laney woke, the first thing she felt was warmth. It was as though she was laying on a glorious Mediterranean beach, the sun beaming down on her with a gentle breeze blowing across her skin. She took a breath and realized she could breath without pain, and she could smell. A million different scents blended together filling her with a joy she had never known. She opened her eyes.

Image by Jill Wellington from Pixabay

She found herself in a garden, one that caused all the Better Homes and Gardens winners to look faded and tiny in comparison. She sat up. She was on a blanket, and laid out beside her was a picnic complete with gingham napkins, a wicker basket, and food that looked like nothing she had ever seen before. She felt her stomach growl. What a glorious feeling after years of having no appetite.

“Laney.”

She looked up. There stood Steve, and her daughter Elena. They had decided to name her, after they had gotten back together. Both of them looked radiant. Stepping out from behind them was the King, His Son, and their presence, Arabella. Arabella was luminescent, as though a million stars filled her very being.

The Son came to her and reached out His hand. “Laney, we are so glad you are here. We have been waiting for you.”

Love, all at once a force, a thought, a breath, a place, an entity clothed her as His hand touched hers.

She was home.

Relentless - Part 5: Rock Bottom

“Laney! What are you doing?”

Laney heard her boyfriend’s voice, but she couldn’t remember where they were. Were they at home? Where were the dogs? She suddenly felt Steve shaking her.

“Laney, what did you do? You killed our baby…my baby…” Steve shook her harder. “Open your eyes, damn it! Look at me!”

Laney forced her eyes to open. She tried to smile, but her face didn't seem to want to respond to what her brain was telling it to do.

Image by 0fjd125gk87 from Pixabay

“…hey, babe…what…time is it?”

Steve shoved her back into the couch. She usually didn’t make it that far after a binge.

“I’m done, Laney. You are on your own. That’s really what you wanted anyway, wasn’t it. You aren’t selfish, you are lost.”

Steve left, slamming the door.

Laney tried to say something, but nothing would come out. She tried to sit up, but she was so hungover she knew that wouldn’t be a good idea.

What was his problem anyway?

“It was my choice…” The words rang out into the empty room sounding like a hollow bell. “Myles? Sophie?”

Image by Linda Crouse from Pixabay

“It was my choice…” she muttered as she fell back asleep.

When she woke some time later it was dark. Not merely the darkness of night, but an inky, thick blackness that seemed to suck the breath out of her. Laney felt paralyzed, but she knew it wasn’t the alcohol and drugs, this was the paralysis of fear.

“Was it your choice?” A smooth voice whispered out of the blackness.

Laney forced herself to sit up. She knew her eyes were open, but why couldn’t she see anything. She felt the fear, like a leggy spider crawling up the back of her neck.

“My body! My choice!” She barked out the words like an angry, caged beast.

“My, my, so adamant, so angry, so vulnerable.” The voice taunted her, like a calm, stoic bully.

“Go away! Leave me alone!”

“But where would the fun be in that? My friends and I have been watching you, following you, waiting for you. You may have the King’s seal, but we can still make your life miserable. That’s really what you want anyway, isn’t it? To be miserable?”

Laney thought the voice sounded strangely like Steve’s.

“You are pathetic. You sold those dumb, four legged beasts to support your growing addiction, and then, last week you sold your own fetus.”

The voice began to giggle. The giggle turned into maniacal, stark raving hysteria. That voice was joined by another, and another, and another, until Laney was sure the laughter was coming from inside her head.

Image by Rebecca Martell from Pixabay

She covered her ears and dropped to her knees on the floor her screams becoming the crazed harmony to the unhinged laughter.

“You aren’t real! You’re just some sort of delusion from the alcohol and drugs. Go away!”

The laughing slowed, but it was replaced by whispers that sounded, oddly, like the hissing of a snake. Laney thought she had finally taken too many hallucinogenics, that her brain would no longer be able to tell the difference between the trip and reality. But then the voice started speaking again.

“I’m just a delusion? A monster of your own making? Tell me, Laney, what would the perfect enemy look like? A man with a funny little mustache who commanded armies and almost took over the world? Or how about a man who took his lovers home, then killed and ate them for dinner? No, no, no, my dear girl. I am perfection. You see I have convinced the world that I don’t exist. I can go about my business of manipulating and destroying lives without anyone ever being the wiser. You have talked yourself into believing a lie, and you even have the King’s seal. All of humanity is pathetic…”

Laney heard what the voice was saying, but she couldn’t make sense of it. “Go away!”

“Come now, Laney. The party is just getting started. You know what, I am a rather busy Being, why don’t we just get this over with. Get that bottle of pills that you have hiding in the cereal box in the cupboard. If you take them all, it should be over in just a few hours.”

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Laney gasped. How did he know about the pills? She smirked. Well, of course he would. He was her made up delusion.

“Why not,” she said as she struggled to crawl across the floor towards the kitchen.

“That’s right, Laney. You have nothing left to live for. No dogs, no family. Even your boyfriend, who had bought a ring, left you.”

Laney stopped. “Steve, bought me a ring?”

She felt something begin to twist inside of her. She ignored it and kept moving in the direction of what she thought might be the kitchen. She had to get those pills.

The voice dug in again. “He wanted to marry you. Can you believe he loved you? You made the right choice, you know. You would have never been a good mother.”

“He loved me?”

Image by aleksandra85foto from Pixabay

“Oh, come on Laney! You know he was only marrying you because of the baby. But, even that you have thrown away…the pills are waiting my dear. They will make all of this go away.”

Laney was frozen in a prostrate position when suddenly a thought whispered through her mind…you are loved with an everlasting love…you are the daughter of the King…you matter.

Laney touched her forehead to the floor. “Forgive me, my King…my Lord…my Savior. Rescue me.”

“Do you really think He’s going to listen to your prayers now? After all the weeks, and months, and years of your rebellion?” The voice was becoming angry.

Laney felt the air begin to move. It started like a soft summer breeze and built into a gale force wind. Her hair was whipping around her face. She was sure she could hear thunder, and the hissing and whispering grew tumultuous. Her heart was pounding in her chest and she couldn’t breath.

I’m going to die, she thought.

“ENOUGH!”

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Immediately the darkness was overtaken by a beautiful light. A light so warm and comforting that it caused Laney to weep. She felt her heart, iced over from so many years of pride and rebellion crack. From within it, began to seep all the darkness that she had allowed to consume her life. She cried and cried. As she remembered all the choices, her choices, she felt something like steel wool begin to scrub away the grime of manipulation and deceit.

Time passed. Her tears ebbing and flowing from her place on the floor, then she heard a different voice. She looked up.

“Laney.”

All around her home stood warriors in shining armor of light. Each one nodded at her, their faces full of compassion and joy. In front of her stood the elderly man from the park and at his feet sat Myles and Sophie. He made the motion and the two pups bolted for Laney smothering her in doggie kisses.

Laney couldn’t speak she was so overwhelmed. Then she noticed the young woman standing next to the man. She was shining, like the warriors in their armor. She came to Laney and knelt down beside her. She touched Laney’s cheek where tears had moistened it.

“Mom, I love you, and you are going to be okay.”

Relentless - Part 3: The Pursued - Mercy upon Mercy

Laney had just brought the pups in from their walk and all three of them were wet. It had turned gray early in the day and soon after started to rain. She didn’t like having to walk the pups in the rain, but she knew it was good for all of them. Laney had become very disciplined in her life. It was something she was proud of.

Image by Gundula Vogel from Pixabay

“Okay, guys, no jumping on the furniture until I get your feet wiped off.”

She grabbed a towel she left hanging by the door for just that purpose, and began to wipe Myles’ paws. Sophie sat obediently waiting her turn. Myles gave her plenty of kisses, then padded into the living room where he jumped up to his spot on the couch. Just after she finished Sophie’s paws and hung up the towel, there was a loud clap of thunder that made her jump. Both dogs barked. The lights flickered.

Laney spoke gently to calm the pups down. “It’s okay. It’s just a little thunder. You know it happens a lot when it rains.”

It went dark.

She looked out the front window and the whole neighborhood was dark. The rain was coming down in sheets, while thunder and lightening rumbled and flashed simultaneously.

Image by Pete Linforth from Pixabay

She looked at her phone, thinking she had better log the outage with her electric company. It lit up for one second then it went dark, just like the neighborhood.

She felt panic, the same kind she had felt in the bar on that night over two years ago. She could still hear the whispers. She clenched her teeth.

“Alright, guys! We need to find the flashlight and get some candles lit.” She forced her voice to be calm and upbeat.

It made her think of her dad. He had always been buying candles at garage sales for just those occasions. Her mom would light them all over the house when the lights went out and it always made her feel safe, so she was going to do the same.

Image by Obsidain Photography from Pixabay

The pups padded along behind her as she found the flashlight and then grabbed a variety of candles and their holders from various places in the house. She soon had the living room and kitchen looking like a bright fairy festival at Christmas time.

She gave the dogs their dinner, then scooted down the hall with a candle to her bedroom to change into dry clothes. She looked out the bedroom window and was stunned by how hard it was raining. It looked like there was a wall between her and her neighbor whose house was only a grassy patch and a driveway away.

Image by PublicDomainPictures from Pixabay

She noticed the reflection of the candle in the window, but there was someone standing next to it. She whirled around fear catching in her throat. There was no one there. She nervously pulled the curtains closed without looking back at the window, quickly changed her clothes and went back out to where the pups had curled up on the couch.

She closed all the other curtains as well, then sat between the dogs pulling a blanket over her lap. Myles yawned and rested his head on her lap, while Sophie put her back against her leg. The dogs were her salvation. She did not know what she would do without them.

She began to doze, hoping the rain would stop and the electricity would come back on soon.

Image by Waldryano from Pixabay

Laney woke with a start. Blinding light filled the room and in front of her was the silhouette of what looked like a man in a suit. Both Myles and Sophie had gotten off the couch and were sitting by the man and looked to be licking his fingers.

“Who…who are you?” Laney’s voice trembled. “What do you want?”

Myles barked. The man bent his head towards the dog, then said, “Oh…yes…you are so right, Myles.”

The piercing light diminished. Laney could see the candles she had lit around the room. The light continued to recede until it was just a warm glow around the man. She saw him smiling as he looked around her home.

Laney grabbed her phone still laying in her lap from when she had dozed off, but of course it still had no charge. She stood up.

“What are you, some sort of utility worker? It’s great that you got out here to fix the power so quickly, but you really shouldn’t be coming into people’s homes without being invited!”

The man chuckled. “Well, Myles and Sophie said I was completely welcome. Besides, I was sent here to talk to you.”

Image by Lalo Viamontes from Pixabay

Laney glanced towards the front door. If she could make a mad dash, she might be able to get out of the house. She could run to a neighbor’s.

“Laney.” The man’s voice was gentle. “I’m not going to hurt you. I am here at the request of the King. He wants you to come home.”

Laney rolled her eyes. “Here we go again. Why does he keep bothering me? Doesn’t he understand I want nothing to do with him or his silly kingdom. He doesn’t own me.”

The gentleman moved towards one of the chairs opposite the couch. “Do you mind if I sit?”

Laney was about to say of course she minded, but he sat.

“You say he doesn’t own you, but you gave him your heart oath and in turn he placed his seal on you. Let me show you. Myles, Sophie, here.”

Laney was aghast as the dogs moved obediently to wear the man sat. He raised his hand and it began to glow brighter. He lifted up Myles’ ear. Placing his hand behind the dog’s ear, Laney could plainly see something that resembled a royal seal glowing.

“Sophie’s is embedded near her heart, and yours…” He stood and moved towards her gently taking her wrist.

“You wanted yours on your wrist so it looked like a tattoo.” He smiled as the glow from his hand revealed the same royal seal on her arm.

She pulled her arm away angrily. “You need to go! Now!”

The man’s face looked sorrowful. He turned towards the door, but stopped and said. “Laney, it is easy to cling to bad things that happened in your life, but it blinds you to all the times mercy was extended to you in the form of his protection, his provision, his love. Open your heart to him again. Even this evening, this storm…it was his way of watching over you.”

He turned towards the pups. “He knows you are doing everything you can and he is so pleased. Don’t give up on her. He isn’t.”

Myles and Sophie barked and followed him to the door. He opened the door, his glowing silhouette backlit by a flash of lighting, then he was gone.

Laney rushed to the door, slamming it and turning both of the locks. She even went to all the other outside doors and the windows and made sure each one was locked.

Image by PublicDomainArchive from Pixa

“Stupid, weird utility man…” she muttered as she finished.

* * * * *

Laney woke to the clock on her bedside table blinking, and the sun shinning through a slit in between the closed curtains. The thought crossed her mind that perhaps the whole incident with the stranger in her house was just a dream. She decided it must have been and began her morning routine.

She turned on the TV, starting her healthy morning smoothy. As she cut up the fruit to throw in the blender her ears tuned in to something the local news anchor was saying.

“…Late last night police finally caught the Urban Exterminator, notorious serial rapist and murderer. It seems the Exterminator was looking to take his next victim from one of the neighborhoods near 8th and Dernst Avenues and stalled out his vehicle going through a flooded area near a plugged up storm sewer drain…”

Laney’s jaw dropped. Hers was one of those neighborhoods. The stranger’s voice echoed in her head. “…it is easy to cling to bad things that happened in your life, but it blinds you to all the times mercy was extended to you in the form of his protection, his provision, his love…Even this evening, this storm…it was his way of watching over you.”

Relentless - Part 2: The Pursued - The Gift

“Where are they? Myles? Sophie?” Laney called and whistled, but the dogs did not respond.

She had come to the park, their evening routine after she got home from work, but something had caught their eye, or their nose, and they had nearly pulled her down on her face before the leashes slid roughly from her hands.

She felt herself beginning to panic. What if she couldn’t find them? What if they didn’t come back? They were her constant companions. She couldn’t live without them.

“Sophie! Myles! Come!” She called loudly again as she jogged in the direction they had zoomed off.

She pulled out her phone. Her friend Jeremy would know what to do. He was always there to help her out. After a second he answered.

“Hello?”

“Jeremy, this is Laney. Hey, I’m at Preston Park. Myles and Sophie got away from me. Can you come help me look for them.”

“Um…well, I…I’m kinda busy right now, Laney. I’m sure they’ll be fine. Just hang out for a bit and they’ll probably come loping back in a few minutes.”

Laney was disappointed, but she didn’t let on. “Oh, okay. Well, thanks. See you at work tomorrow.”

She kept walking, but slowed her pace. Jeremy was probably right. They would come back in just a few minutes after they were done stimulating their noses. She headed toward the wooded area because she knew the pups loved to rummage around in the leaves.

Laney was proud of herself. She’d finally stopped messing around and started to take life seriously. After that last weird encounter at the bar, she decided to keep her drinking confined to her small home, and only when she had friends over. She had finally gotten an administrative position at work, got a great raise, good health insurance and a title that made her finally feel worth something. People came to her for advice and looked up to her.

Why was it then, she felt so alone?

Image by Werner Heiber from Pixabay

Still, he pursued her. She could feel it in the quiet moments, which was exactly why she didn’t allow the silence. She had a routine. As she got home she was greeted by the barking of Myles and Sophie, the two rescues she adored. She changed her clothes, put on her headphones, cranked up the music and took the pups for a long walk. When they returned she turned on the TV to have a show on in the back ground as she made herself a healthy meal. It stayed on until she either went to bed, went out with friends or had friends over.

Her life before she left Him was becoming a blur, almost as though it wasn’t real. She had just about convinced herself it was just some sort of weird dream, a fairy tale of sorts, or it had seemed like a fairy tale until something bad had happened; something that He had not stopped. The question always nagged at her, if he really loved her why hadn’t he protected her?

Laney followed the path that wandered into the heavily treed area of the park. Just as she came around a corner she saw Sophie and Myles sitting in front of an elderly man on a bench.

“There you are! You two are in so much trouble.” She reached them and picked up both of their leads.'

“I am so sorry,” Laney said to the man. “They just took off. Just about dragged me with them.”

The gentleman chuckled. “Oh they were zooming for sure, but I could tell they belonged to someone who cared for them very much. I told them they had to sit with me until you came.”

Laney wasn’t sure what to think of the man, but he seemed quite harmless. Plus it was still daylight and there were people around. She sat down next to him.

She smiled. “You told them?”

He was looking off into the woods. He started, as if noticing her for the first time. “What was that?”

“You said, you told Myles and Sophie to sit with you until I came.”

He smiled gently as he patted Myles on the head. “Oh, yes…yes. This one is all for fun. He wanted to keep running, but his sister told him to listen. She’s the one with the deep desire to please you.”

Laney let out a small laugh. “You understand them…who are you Dr. Doolittle?”

The man smiled. “Oh no, no. That was just a made up story. I…well….I have a gift.”

“A gift?”

“Some would call it discernment. Others might call it knowledge…whatever it is I just know I’ve had it since I was seven years old.”

Laney looked at him, trying to figure out if he was serious. She suddenly felt worried for the man. “Are you okay? I mean do you need me to call someone? Do you live around here?”

He gently put a hand on her knee and patted it. “Now don’t you worry. I am perfectly sane, if that’s what you are wondering. I just know things, that’s all.”

Laney was intrigued. “What sorts of things? Has Myles told you he wants another sibling, because I cannot afford another…”

The gentleman burst into laughter, his eyes crinkling with mirth. His smile seemed to make the shaded path burst into light.

“I can tell you that Myles and Sophie were both rescues. Sophie has always loved to submit. It makes her happy to do her owner’s will. She is gentle and peaceful. Myles…well, he’s a lot like you.”

“Me?”

“Yes. He likes to run. He has very little patience for sitting still. Some days he wants to run and run and never turn back.”

Laney looked at Myles. “What? You would do that?”

Myles barked. The man continued. “Oh, he won’t ever leave you. He has a seal.”

“A seal?”

“Yes. Both Sophie and Myles have it. It was given to them by someone very important. You see, Myles and Sophie were both severely treated and abused. He gives them the most important job, to watch over the lost ones…You are very fortunate. He must love you a great deal. Myles and Sophie were created just for you.”

Laney sat there stunned, a tiny pin prick poking her heart. She took a deep breath and willed her mind to override the feelings. She stood up.

“Well, that’s all very interesting. I really need to go. I’ve got friends coming for dinner. Are you sure you don’t want me to call someone?”

The man patted Myles and Sophie again and whispered something only they could hear, then lifted his head to Laney.

“Thank you for sitting with me, even if just for a minute. It means the world to me.” He smiled again.

Laney had to pull the pups away from him as she moved down the path out of the woods. She turned back one time to see if the old man was going to try to follow her, but he was gone.

Relentless - Part 1: The Pursued

The following piece and its subsequent installments are works of fiction created by myself as allegorical of the Christian life. As with any allegory it is a picture or type, more specifically in this case a picture of what our relationship with God might look like. The following parts will be posted monthly on the fourth Thursday as part of my Creative Christianity feature. I hope you will enjoy it.

He was coming for her. She didn’t know how she knew, but she knew. She tried to shake it off, telling herself she was being silly. Why would he still be pursuing her? She had left the smothering confines of his kingdom long ago. She was nothing to him, not any more. She had made sure of that.

Image by Christian_Birkholz from Pixabay

She smiled coyly at the bloke sitting at the end of the bar. He looked like a decent sort and maybe with a bit of change. She could tell by the sunglasses that sat on the top of his finely coiffed hair and the watch that shone loudly on his wrist.

“Buy me a drink?” She used her most innocent, yet seductive purr.

“Sure,” he responded with feigned enthusiasm. He sidled closer to where she sat.

She could tell he’d been here before. Not in this exact pub, but at this point in life. His wife or current lover had jilted him, leaving him for someone with fresher curb appeal. Just like her he was trying to find a small measure of comfort, even if just for a moment.

“I’d ask you what’s a nice girl like you doing in a dive like this, but I think we both know, neither of us is very nice.” His voice sounded tired.

She smiled. “My, my, a philosopher.”

He smirked, the corner of his mouth just barely rising before he lifted his glass in a mock toast towards hers. “How did you know? Was it my snarky response, or my academic attire that gave me away?”

Image by Michal Jarmoluk from Pixabay

She clinked her glass against his. “Definitely, the snark.”

They sank into a puddle of warm conversation, not really talking about anything, but also everything. He told her about his kids; she talked about her dogs. He shared the frustrations of the academic world, and she griped about the long hours she worked in the medical arena.

“So why are you here?” He asked. “You seem like a genuinely descent person? Don’t you have a family, friends, a significant other?”

The alcohol was beginning to make her feel odd. Her whole body was covered with goosebumps.

“Ooo, I feel weird. Hey you didn’t put something in my drink did you?” She looked at the professor, whose face looked concerned. “Hey, bartender! I need some help. I think this guy messed with my drink.”

The lights over the bar and around the pub began to flicker. She looked around the room and suddenly realized she and the bloke were the only ones in the room. She didn’t even see the bar tender, who was normally playing musical glasses as he cleaned and wiped down the counter.

“I feel it too,” the professor said quietly.

“Feel what?”

“A presence.” The man’s voice had become a subdued whisper.

Image by Robert Owen-Wahl from Pixabay

The lights went out, all except the blinking open sign in the window. The pub seemed to fill with moving shadows and sounds. She thought it sounded like many voices whispering, or were they hissing. She knew in her gut she needed to run, but she couldn’t.

“What have you done?” The man’s voice sounded befuddled.

Funny, it made her think of her mother asking her the same question when she had emptied a three pound bag of flour onto the living room floor.

The prof looked at her with wide eyes. “You are one of his. You have his seal.”

She jumped off the stool and away from him. “What? What are you talking about? I don’t belong to anyone! I’m my own person.”

The shadows in the room seemed to grow, almost taking on a three dimensional quality. Were they moving towards her?

“Then why are they here?” The bloke nodded towards the shadows.

“I assure you I don’t have any idea what they are, let alone why they are here.”

“Boy, you really are naive aren’t you. Everyone knows anyone who leaves his kingdom will be followed by the Shadowed Ones.”

Image by Engin Akyurt from Pixabay

She looked from the creeping shadows to the professor. “Well, I highly doubt that everyone has this information seeing as this is the first time I have heard of it.”

The bloke’s face became gentle and kind. “He wants you to come back. He never wanted you to leave. He loves you, Laney.”

Laney felt her jaw drop. “How do you know my name? I didn’t tell you my name.”

“Laney, he will never stop pursuing you. He cannot bear that you have left. He knows exactly who you are and what you need. Return to him.”

Laney shook her head. “NO! I can’t go back. It’s too late….this has to be a nightmare….maybe if I just close my eyes it will all disappear.”

The professor put a hand on her shoulder. Laney felt a different presence. Suddenly, an explosion of light forced her to close her eyes, but a force that could only be described as a tsunami of love swept passed her.

It was gone. She heard the tinkle of glasses, subdued voices and snippets of laughter surround her. Opening her eyes she found herself sitting at the bar. The bartender was busy wiping the counter. There were a few others at the bar, but the snarky professor had vanished.

The bartender approached. “Need another round, Laney?”

Laney looked at her empty glass. She took a deep shuddering breath. “Fill it up!”

A Lesson in Weaving

She watched her through the open window that looked down on the small balcony. The young girl looked out over the river that lazily wandered past the castle. The child was hers, but she was no longer looked like a small girl. She had grown in those years she had been held captive by the enemy lord. She felt a lump in her throat that she could not swallow. The girl, her girl, didn’t want anything to do with her, her very own mother, nor her grandfather, the King.

Image by DarkWorkX from Pixabay

When they had first found her in the enemy’s castle she was like a caged animal. The room they found her in was filled with waste and squalor. The girl did not recognize her mother at first and when she tried to take her in her arms, which ached to hold her again, the girl screamed. That scream had pierced her soul. They were finally able to get her out of the castle by coaxing her out with sweets. The thought of it still made her shudder.

Eventually, the girl saw that they were not going to hurt her and in fact were going to provide for her pretty clothes and good food, things that she hadn’t gotten when she was a captive, but still, she kept asking when she could go home. It galled her to think her only child thought of his palace as her home, even after how she had been treated.

A noise from behind her caused her to turn. Her father, the King, approached. He put his arm around her shoulders and gave her a squeeze.

“Father, I don’t know what to do. I feel absolutely helpless…I know she is hurting, and probably angry at me. I let it happen. I let her get caught by that evil man. I am to blame and now, I can’t even look at her without feeling utterly hopeless.”

The King took in a deep breath and let it out very slowly. She often saw him do this when he was thinking before he spoke, a practice he always thought wise.

“Daughter, you know how very much I love you, so I can understand those feelings of helplessness and even hopelessness. Did you know that I could not sleep at night when you were being courted by your late husband? It terrified me to let you go, knowing each step you took towards independence took you further and further away from me. But, I had to learn to trust the One. I knew that He would always take care of you, no matter where you were. Even when I eventually sent you into battle.”

Image by Enrique Meseguer from Pixabay

She pulled away from him, suddenly feeling angry. “This is not a simple courting session that my daughter went through. She was beaten, starved and we don’t even know yet, if he did other vile things to her. She was just a child. Was the One with her, when that was going on, or has He abandoned her…has He abandoned us?”

The King sat heavily in a chair that stood near the fire burning cheerfully in a brazier. He pulled the footstool in front of him and patted it.

Once again, he wanted her to sit, to listen, to learn from him.

As she did so often, she began to pace. “No! I am not going to sit at your feet, like a little child and have you explain to me, how I need to trust the One. He let my little girl get hurt. He let her get caught by that vile enemy.”

“Now wait a minute. Is it your fault, or is it His fault?”

She stopped and stared. “Well…I….I….I don’t know! All I know, is that little girl is not the same person I knew before she was taken.”

“Are you the same person you were before she was taken?”

She inhaled, trying to practice the same technique he did, not speaking until she was sure she was in control.

“No. I am not.”

He patted the foot stool again and smiled.

Reluctantly she sat.

He leaned forward and took her hands in his own large ones. She could feel the callouses there. He was no show piece. He was a king who fought and bled beside his own men for the causes he believed in. How could he keep his calm demeanor? He always seemed at peace, no matter what.

“How do you to it? How did you send me into battle, knowing full well, I might never return?”

“Do you remember how your mother used to love to weave tapestries?”

Image by MrsBrown from Pixabay

She smiled, remembering her mother, the Queen working tirelessly into the night weaving various colored threads together. “She used to hang it, so that when we came into the room, we could not see what the finished picture would be.”

The King let out a chuckle. “Oh yes. Once time I tried to sneak in when she was away and she had the loom booby trapped! I suddenly found myself doused by a bucket of honey mead. I couldn’t get the flies away from me for weeks.”

She laughed, remembering her father taking bath, after bath, after bath, but unable to get the sweet ale completely washed out of his hair.

He squeezed her hands. “Your mother always had a purpose for everything she did. Why do you think she presented the tapestry to us only from the back side, until the work was done?”

She shrugged. “I had always assumed she just loved the surprise on our faces when we finally saw it.”

“Oh there was definitely that! However, in addition to that she wanted to remind us of what real life is like.”

“I don’t understand.”

“Life is made up of all manner of threads, some beautiful colors and others dull and even ugly. If you didn’t know that the front of the tapestry was going to be made into a beautiful work of art, you would have thought the piece merely an ugly, jumble of random colored threads and knots where the threads had been tied off. It is that jumbled mess that makes up our lives. The ugly threads and the beautiful ones are all necessary to make the completed picture.

The One is weaving those threads. He is making all of it, even the threads we don’t understand or want to understand into a picture of such great beauty that it will be declared a masterpiece, when we finally see the finished product.

Your mother was an artist and she taught you those same skills before she passed on. What are you going to do with your threads? You can use them to create beauty, or like our now dead enemy, you can use them to weave chaos.”

The King leaned forward and kissed her forehead, then he rose to his feet and quietly left the room.

She stared into the fire, that slowly claimed the fuel it was burning. The fire was chaotic, yet it served a purpose to provide warmth and cook food. It was even beautiful in its dance of flame. Could it be, her father was right; that beauty could come from the chaos of life?

She knew what she had to do. She would teach her daughter the loom. She would teach her the dance of light and flame, darkness and chaos and pray the One would bring healing and beauty for them both.

This is a fiction piece by Amy D. Christensen

In 2010 Ravi Zacharias wrote a book titled, The Grand Weaver. It was this book and the images he shared of God being the grand weaver of our lives that inspired the imagery revolving around the tapestry in this story. If we can grasp His divine plan for our lives, in which He uses all the good, the bad and the ugly, how much easier would it be to let Him have control. I hope you enjoyed this story.

You can see the previous parts to this story by clicking on the links below:

Part 1: Return to Battle

Part 2: A Father’s Perspective

Part 3: Waiting

Part 4: Ready to Die

Ready to Die

Dust and smoke rose into the air, creating a haze so thick the sun could barely penetrate. They had been fighting for days. Days that seemed to go on forever. They would push forward, but the enemy's forces always seemed able to push them back. She thought they were prepared for this battle. Her father, the King had thought they were ready, but now she wasn't so sure he had been right.

Pixabay

The enemy soldiers were not like any other she had fought. They had battled against them previously, but something had happened in those months since that prince of darkness had taken her daughter. She wasn't sure what it was. Maybe it was because they were in his territory. Maybe it was due to the long journey their own army had to traverse to get here. Whatever, it was, she did not feel confident in their ability to win this battle. 

The thought made her cringe. How could she even be thinking these thoughts. She had never struggled with doubt before. She always had been confident in her Father's abilities as both a King and a commander. Now, however, doubts seem to plague her like some sort of blister on her foot and she had a lot of those. Her feet hurt. Her legs were stiff and her arms felt like lead. Fatigue filled her being from toes to fingertips.

Pixabay

Now, her small battalion was surrounded. She was not even sure how it happened. They began the day's fighting in the clear, but now they were backed up against a canyon wall. They were hemmed in on every side. The only thing that kept them from being slaughtered was that they were on the high ground. Every time the enemy tired to attack, they sent a volley of arrows flying and the enemy retreated, but their arrows were running out. 

Pixabay

"Your highness?" One of her men had come up behind her.

"Yes?"

"We only have enough arrows for one more attack...then..."

She knew the time had come. She had to make the choice to surrender or to go down fighting. She turned to face the soldier.

"I want you to bring the men together. I want to speak to them."

The soldier nodded, bowed and quickly left her.

She went to her knees. "Father, I know you cannot hear me, but wherever you are, I want you to know how much I love you and how much I look up to you. I know that I have been angry, frustrated and impatient in this mission to rescue my child, but you have never wavered and for that I am thankful. I know there is no way out of this. My child might be dead and soon that will be my fate as well, but I will never surrender to that vile, son of filth. I will go down fighting. Thank you for never giving up on me."

Tears, brimmed her eyes. She clenched her fists rising to her feet. Turning, she went to where the men were assembled. She was shocked at how very few of them were left. She stood before them, her head high.

"I would like to offer you hope. The hope that I give you is not hope for life, but hope to die with honor. Today, we are going to die, but you have a choice in how you do it. You can go out cowering, or you can go out, sword in hand, taking as many of those cursed vermin as possible before you fall. If you do that, I will be proud. If you do that, my father will be proud."

Her voice grew loud and her words were clear. "Today, let us die, for the sake of our King!"

She raised her sword and the men raised their's, voices matching hers; a chorus of rebellion they hoped the enemy would hear.  

It was not long before they saw the dust of their enemies' horses, filling the small valley below their sacrificial high ground. She instructed the men to form two lines. The first line was made up of the remaining archers. They went down on one knee, nocking their arrows as they did. The second line was made up of what was left of the battalion. She knew they had no chance, but they would die with honor, fighting for their King, her father. 

"Hold steady archers!" Her voice rang out even as the noise rose ushered in by the approaching chaos. "Hold until I give the order!"

Closer the dust came and along with it the sound of pounding hooves, a battalion of enemy riders bringing death.

Her heart beat rose and sweat mingled with the dirt and grime trickling down her neck. It felt itchy. Funny, she thought, the things one thinks about before one dies. 

Suddenly, the sky seemed to turn dark. She lifted her eyes up and saw shadows coursing through the sky over her head. She felt confused, but then those shadows became the solid forms of horses and their riders. Her heart sank. They were surrounded...

But wait! Those riders wore the King's colors!

Her men looked just as confused as she felt, but more and more shadows flew overhead, diving straight into the approaching storm. She heard a shout.

"Daughter!"

Pixabay

A dusty figure on his steady mount appeared behind her. It was her father, the King.

He smiled at her, then held down his hand. Pulling her up onto his horse, he commanded others of his battalion to take up her remaining men. Once all the were mounted with other soldiers, the King raised his hand and his voice.

"This ends now!"

(This was a fictional work by Amy D. Christensen)

*     *     *     *     *      *

This fictional work is meant to remind you, when all seems lost, the King is behind you. When the dust storm of the approaching enemy brings you to the end of yourself, the King is above you. When you are severely outnumbered and you have very little left to fight with, the King is diving in ahead of you. He will be there for you, every day, every hour, every battle and especially when you finally lay down your weapons and face the last enemy of death. 

“ ....I am with you always, even to the end of the age.”

— Matthew 28:20 (NASB)

For the other parts in this fictional series, click on the links below. 

Part 1: Return to Battle

Part 2: A Father's Perspective

Part 3: Waiting

What I Learned from a Grapefruit

There are lessons to be learned in all areas of life. We can learn from classes, books, videos and computers. We can learn from people, animals and even plants, but a piece of fruit? Go figure. I am always amazed at God's ability to speak into my life in the most random ways. Yes, He uses His word, but like so many, I am busy and don't always crack open my Bible. Often, unfortunately, it might be days before I look at the Word of God. However, God still miraculously speaks, even when I am not listening or looking for Him. 

This morning, I decided to eat the last grapefruit that had been sitting in my fruit basket. I always cut my grapefruit in half and eat the small sections with a grapefruit spoon. I am well acquainted with citrus fruit that goes bad. The outside usually becomes green and fuzzy and a soft indentation begins to appear. The rot is obvious. This one still looked fine, although, I thought it might be a little dried out, as it had been sitting around for a few weeks. This is what appeared when I cut it open. 

Tasty, huh?

It was then the analogy hit me like a brick. Here I am a fashion and faith blogger. I put hours into coming up with outfits, thinking up themes for my fashion posts and so on, but when it comes to my faith posts, I am flying by the seat of my pants. Obviously, the fact that I just came up with this post this morning after looking at a rotten grapefruit, drives the point home. The point being this, I can be pretty and put together on the outside, but the inside can be deteriorating without me even being aware of it. 

There are a few points I would like to draw from my moldy citrus example. 

1. Rot often occurs slowly. 

The problem, most often, with sin is that we become comfortable with it. We think that as long as we look like we have it all together, have a positive vibe about us and don't talk about our inner struggles, then our inner struggles won't come to light. We all struggle. We all sin. 

“23 for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God,”

— Romans 3:23 (NASB)

I tend to forget that I am a sinner saved by grace. I bask in God's grace and I am thankful for it, but often as Christians when we move further away from our original conversion and initial consciousness of how sin separates us from God, we tend to forget what the cross was all about in the first place. This fading of our roots contributes to the rot that takes place in our hearts. Before we know it, we have allowed ourselves to become involved in activities we once shunned from watching movies with prolific language, violence and sex, to doubts about the origins of our world, to becoming part of the gossip chain. 

2. Rot spoils our taste.

Have you ever bit into something that is rotten? Ewww! It doesn't not taste good! In fact, one little rotten spot can spoil an entire piece of fruit. I will cut off rotten spots on most things like strawberries, peaches or melons, but trying to cut the rot out of an orange or grapefruit usually doesn't work. 

When I allow sin to slowly deteriorate my relationship with God, my usefulness will also deteriorate. 

“Therefore, salt is good; but if even salt has become tasteless, with what will it be seasoned?”

— Luke 14:34 (NASB)

We are supposed to be salt. Salt is meant to season and preserve. When we begin to rot we are unable to season or preserve. In fact, we become less useful in God's plan, because we are less likely to hear His voice prodding us to move. 

3. Rot affects others. 

Our internal decay affects those around us. The rot of unexpressed discontent, anger, grief or sadness, not only affects us, but it affects those we love and interact with. Look at the picture Solomon paints of the husband/wife relationship.

“An excellent wife is the crown of her husband, But she who shames him is like rottenness in his bones.”

— Proverbs 12:4 (NASB)

Those are pretty tough words to hear. We can become rottenness in our husband's bones, if we are allowing ourselves to deteriorate on the inside. You have probably heard the word toxic in reference to relationships and people. We can become toxic if the rot inside of us is unchecked and takes over. 

4. Rot will be cut away.

As children of God, He will only allow us to continue to deteriorate to a certain point, before He gets out the cutlery and begins removing the rot from our hearts. That process can be very painful. However, if we desire to draw closer to Him, then we need to allow His scalpel to have its way. 

““If your hand or your foot causes you to stumble, cut it off and throw it from you; it is better for you to enter life crippled or lame, than to have two hands or two feet and be cast into the eternal fire.”

— Matthew 18:8 (NASB)

Jesus was speaking figuratively in this verse, but the point is of prime importance. If we allow something in our lives that not only causes us to stumble and fall, but causes others to fall as well, we need to let the divine surgeon do His work. 

We are beautiful creations of the Almighty God. We are meant to glorify Him and lift others up to Him. Just as a piece of ripe, whole fruit is full of nutrients and good things that bring life and sustenance, we are to be wholly His, rot free, so that we are bringing life and light to those who are perishing. 

The Tower

I lived there once, the Tower. More accurately, I was held captive there. Maybe you are familiar with my story. I was young and curious and that curiosity would often lead me off the beaten path. One particularly beautiful day, when it wasn't quite spring yet, but the sky shone so blue and the sun so bright that I couldn't help but wander, I came upon the castle...his castle. It was beautiful in the sun light, covered with green ivy. The stone walls were built with some ingredient that sparkled, and I loved bling. Before I knew it, I was touching the warm walls with my fingertips. I wasn't afraid. I had no reason to be, or at least I didn't know of one.I walked along the wall until I came to a heavy wooden door and there he was.

Arundel Castel - Arundel, West Essex, England - Photo by Amy Christensen

He was tall and very handsome. His light brown hair fell in waves to his broad shoulders. He smiled at me and held out his hand. I took it.

I don't know why! What was I thinking? He was nice to me for a while, giving me presents and telling me I was special, but then he took me to the tower. It became my prison. It wasn't until after he had locked the door that I realized I had made a mistake. Fear grabbed my stomach like a claw then scrabbled its way up into my throat. What had I done? How could I have been so naive, so foolish? The tower became not only my prison, but my torture chamber. The first time he pulled me close I realized his flesh smelled like the breath of hell and rotting meat. He never took me, but would hold me close, until I nearly suffocated from the stench, then he would push me away, mocking me, telling me I was ugly and stupid. Then he would leave locking the door behind him, laughing as he walked down the hall. Over and over, day after day. I had no idea what he would do when he came in. I was terrified. It was always the same. He would hold me, his putrid scent filling my nostrils, until I no longer noticed it. Then he would push me away, railing me with insults. One day, he took the key to the door and threw it out the window. 

Tower steps - Raglan Castle - Raglan, Wales - Photo by Amy Christensen

Turning to me he grinned, "You will never be enough!" He walked out the door, laughing down the hall until I could no longer hear him.

I fell into a heap and cried. I didn't even care if I was rescued. I just wanted to die. I was worthless. No one would come for me. No one would ever love me, especially now that I reeked of his lair, his stench. Everyone would know that I was not enough. 

That was years ago now. The Prince saved me. He rescued me. He came and defeated the master of that castle who held me captive. On that day He stood in the door of my tower, I will never forget the eyes that shown like that bluest sky I remembered so well from when I was captured. I cowered at the other side of the small room with a ragged blanket wrapped around my shoulders. He came and knelt down in front of me. 

Holding out His hand he said gently, "Why are you here? You are free. Come, beloved!"

I winced. Shaking my head I tried to back even further into the stone of the walls that had imprisoned me. 

He smiled, "Come, beloved!"

"No!" My voice came out like a squawk. 

He moved to touch me, but I scooted back. He persisted. "You are my beloved. Come, take my hand."

This time, I stood up. "No! I....am...not. I...am...not...enough!"

The prince stood and in one step gathered me into his arms. The first thing I noticed was that he smelled of earth and pine, flowers and fields. He took my face into his hands and said, "Beloved, I am!"

There are still times, I hear that other voice, "You will never be enough!" It comes as a whisper at the end of the day when the sun is waning and the sky darkens.Those words that once held so much power over me were real and cut deep. But the Prince brought healing. His voice has become a balm to my injured soul. He is enough. And I am His. 

““...I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with unfailing kindness.”

— Jeremiah 31:3 (NASB)

“I belong to my beloved, and his desire is for me”

— Song of Songs 7:10 (NASB)

Return to Battle

She stood, looking at the expanse of land that rolled out from the castle walls. Her balcony overlooked the picturesque river valley and as the sun began to set she could see its fire glinting off the distant liquid ribbon. She felt rested, still there were moments where she wanted to stay in the soft bed that stood closer to the fireplace. There, the fire always seemed to burn cheerily in its stone dwelling. 

The battle had been fierce. Had she foreseen the damage that happened on that particular day, she might have run. But she didn't. She stood her ground and fought, just as many others did beside her. Some fell at her feet and she had to step over them, still fighting, raising her sword over and over and over. Her arms grew so fatigued she no longer felt the sword in her hand, only kept the repetitive movement; lift, swipe, strike, jab. She had no idea how many her sword had taken down. She didn't need to know. They were all enemies of the King.

Pixabay

The only wound she received was one of the heart. No one could see it, but it was there and it was deep. One she loved most dear had been taken by the enemy. A captive, taken, she knew not where; tormented, she knew not how, though she could easily imagine. The vileness of the enemy was obvious in the land. He had no reason to be subtle. He was powerful and prideful. She knew one day, that pride would be his downfall, but until then, they'd continue to fight against him and to fall.

She turned when she heard footsteps. A servant approached her tentatively. He bowed.

"His Highness, the King wishes to see you in the library." The young man kept his head lowered.

She thanked him and he left.

She put on her shoes and wrapped herself in a warm bulky sweater. Closing her door behind her she moved soundlessly down the hallways of the castle. She knew how to move without making noise. She had been trained in all areas of covert and overt combat. Before she entered the library, she took a deep, calming breath.

She loved the library. It wasn't just her love of reading and books that drew her here. It was the coziness and peacefulness of the place. The walls were made of rich, dark mahogany. The carpeting which ran wall to wall was plush. Sometimes she would take off her shoes, just to feel the softness of the rug beneath her. The curtains hanging at the windows were made of deep red velvet. Interspersed throughout the room were luxuriant furnishings of all sizes. Her favorite was an over sized chair and its companion footstool that sat close to the grand fireplace. It was in this chair that the King sat. His feet were up and his eyes were closed.

She stopped. If she didn't wake him, she could skulk back to her room and put off for a little while longer this conversation she knew was coming. That wasn't going to happen. His voice carried clearly from his comfortable position.

"Come, dear one. Sit."

His blue eyes looked at her. She moved closer to the fireplace, but didn't sit. 

He put his feet on the floor and patted the foot stool. She smiled at him, feeling like a lost sheep, but instead of sitting she began to pace.

"You know it is time." His voice was gentle.

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She looked towards the fire blazing furiously in the hearth. She didn't want him to see her fear. She didn't want him to know how her heart cowered. Silly, she knew. He could always read her like one of the many books surroundng them.

"I know you do not feel ready. I know you are hurt, inside, where it is so much harder to heal. But you are one of my best warriors. I can't let you stay here any longer. There is too much at stake. There are too many at risk."

The gentle tone of his voice was almost maddening. She knew he was right, but she needed more time. She couldn't go back out there. Not yet. She couldn't go back to that war, that enemy. That one who ripped something, someone from her who was so precious. She just wanted to forget. To pretend none of it ever happened....but she couldn't. She knew it and so did the King.

"I...I can't my Lord! I...I...am not ready."

He sat forward in the plush chair and once again patted the footstool in front of him. She sat, their knees almost touching.

He put a hand on her cheek and wiped the tear that had fallen there. "Daughter, this is about a much bigger war than the one we fight on this plain. You know that."

She was up again. Pacing, back and forth in front of the blaze, like a caged lion, looking, always looking for a way out. "You don't understand! This enemy...he's different! He's vile....you don't know! You weren't there!"

He stood and in one step was in front of her, his graying beard becoming straggly from lack of time for grooming. He stopped her and took her hands in his. 

"I was there." Again the gentleness.

She looked at him questioning. "What do you mean? I would have known if you were there."

"Do you remember that battle, back in the winter? There was a certain warrior wearing animal skins and donning a helmet with horns. You laughed when you told me about him....said he was a Viking by any other name?"

Her eyes widened.

"And don't forget in the spring, when the rains came, the warrior whose face was so covered in mud you couldn't tell if he was of light or dark skin..."

He paused. 

She felt the coldness that had accompanied her for so long begin to melt away. He had been there. Of course he couldn't come out looking like himself, or the enemy would have recognized him. She looked into his piercing blues, questioning....

"The time will come, when I will come out as the King, but not yet...this war is not just about the child that was taken from you, but about all the children, and all the souls that are ensnared by our enemy. I need you back at the front."

She took a deep breath and shuddered. She could say no. She was his daughter, after all. She didn't have to go back and he would still love her. Of that she had no doubt. But his words about the children got to her. Her child was taken. Stolen from her by that enemy. Even if she was still alive and they found her, she knew her daughter would have scars. 

She squeezed the strong, calloused hands that hung on to hers. They were the hands of a warrior, a king and her father. She knew they would always follow her into battle, fighting beside her until she took her final breath. 

She went to her knees before him. "I am ready, my Lord."

“ Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous! Do not tremble or be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.””

— Joshua 1:9 (NASB)

“Finally, be strong in the Lord and in the strength of His might. Put on the full armor of God, so that you will be able to stand firm against the schemes of the devil. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the powers, against the world forces of this darkness, against the spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places. Therefore, take up the full armor of God, so that you will be able to resist in the evil day, and having done everything, to stand firm. Stand firm therefore, having girded your loins with truth, and having put on the breastplate of righteousness, and having shod your feet with the preparation of the gospel of peace; in addition to all, taking up the shield of faith with which you will be able to extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. And take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.
With all prayer and petition pray at all times in the Spirit, and with this in view, be on the alert with all perseverance and petition for all the saints, ”

— Ephesian 6:10-18 (NASB)

(This is a fictional work written by Amy D. Christensen)