Book Review - The Deep-Rooted Marriage by Dan B. Allender, PhD and Steve Call, PhD

(This book review is being done in exchange for a free copy of the book. No money was exchanged for this review. All opinions are my own.)

My husband, Mark and I have been married for 37.5 years. The fact that we have been together for more years than we were on our own is rather mind boggling. We came into our marriage, both with certain expectations and our own share of unrealistic ideas about what a Christian marriage should look like. Over the course of those three-plus decades we have read many books on marriage. Thankfully we both were open to the idea of reading books to try to find a path through our unique personalities and our differences of opinion. All of these books were helpful in a variety of ways, but it seemed we still struggled with the same issues time and time again.

The Deep-Rooted Marriage is the first book I have read that has actually left me feeling hopeful rather than overwhelmed. (Mark and I will be reading the book together at a future time, but I needed to get through it for this book review, so you will be hearing my thoughts on it without those of my spouse.)

Dan Allender received a Master of Divinity from Westminster Theological Seminary, and a PhD in Counseling Psychology from Michigan State University. He is a “pioneer of a unique and innovative approach to trauma and abuse therapy.” He also helped found the Seattle School of Theology and Psychology, and The Allender Center. Steve Call received an MA in Theology from Fuller Seminary, an MS in Marriage and Family Therapy, as well as a PhD in Clinical Psychology from Seattle Pacific University. He and his wife, Lisa are the founders of The Reconnect Institute.

Dan and Steve worked hard to author a book that speaks to the heart. This is not a book of lists. It does not give you boxes to check off, nor does it speak to identify our personality differences or our varied love languages. While those things can be helpful on the road to understanding our significant others better, they honestly do not get to the core of who we are.

“Every marriage is a story of two people formed by different worlds joining together to create a universe that has never existed before. Your marriage is unique in all its goodness and in all that needs redemption….Understanding the past allows us to make sense of what’s not working in the present. If we don’t explore our earlier stories, we won’t grasp how our histories of brokenness and beauty are playing out now. And we’ll be bound to repeat them in one form or another.” (p. xi - A Note from Dan - The Deep Rooted Marriage.)

Throughout the book Dan and Steve, along with their wives Becky and Lisa, use examples from their own marriages, and from couples they have counseled, to shed light on the mysteries of marital relationships as they are affected by our upbringing, and the trauma that so many of us bring across the threshold. They also write with hope and positivity making the reader willing to open up and trust the ideas and techniques being put forth.

The book is divided into three parts: Part 1 - Getting Clear-eyed About Who You Are - addresses marital beginnings; things that end up disconnecting us like loneliness, contempt, feeling stuck and a lack of delight; and digs into the unresolved trauma that many of us bring into a marriage.

“You and your partner’s failure of each other is incredibly complex, tangled up with your deeply held ways of being in the world and the relational patterns you each developed in response to trauma throughout your lives.” (p. 35 - The Deep Rooted Marriage.)

Part 2 - Disrupting Divisive Patterns and Changing the Atmosphere - discusses how to create a safe environment in the marriage when we have long used coping mechanisms to get by: things like fragmenting, numbing, isolating as well as anxiety and flight, anger and fight, and avoidance and freezing or fawning. This part also goes more deeply into the areas of shame and contempt which I found very eye opening and compelling.

“No marriage can thrive if contempt is a frequent theme. It is the number one killer of intimacy and hope, functioning like a deadly gas filling the air and poisoning the relationship. As we settle into patterns of resentment, we don’t realize the danger we are tolerating.” (p. 107 - The Deep Rooted Marriage.)

Part 3 - Generating Goodness Between You and Beyond You - speaks to the necessary work of reconnecting, repairing and restoring our marriages through things like validation, inviting our spouses into our experience, engaging in the differences and really trying to understand each other.

“Repair in your marriage will defy logic and reasoning. It will feel both astounding and risky, especially as you give your partner access to hurts. But you are meant to be seen and known, to be honored and cared for, and you can choose to invite the deepest experiences of these things into your marriage. There will always be conflicts and ruptures for you to navigate, but as you grow stronger together over time, the duration of your disconnection will lessen and you’ll find ways to cultivate intimacy amid tension.” (p. 165 - The Deep Rooted Marriage.)

The Deep Rooted Marriage is written from the vantage point of having experience and understanding of not only marital relationships, and clinical psychology and counseling, but from having a faith base. Dan and Steve both believe in the redemptive work of Jesus Christ as being an important influence in our relationships.

I highly recommend this book for any couple, from those just thinking about getting married, to those who have been married for decades, but want to have a deeper understanding of their partner and the place of Christ’s redemptive work in the relationship.

You can also purchase a companion guide to this book, which offers additional insights, questions and exercises for you and your significant other to work through the ideas put forth in the book. At the back of the companion guide is a QR code giving you access to free chapter summary videos for the guide.

“Marriage is not merely getting along or learning to compromise; it reveals who you are and invites you to who you can become. It offers a space for you to experience what you are made for—honor, delight, and tastes of heaven.” (Back cover - The Deep Rooted Companion Guide).

Word for the Year: Trust

Here we are, barreling through another January. A new year has begun and time continues to fly. As I was mulling over the idea of doing another Word of the Year, I had several in mind including a return to believe, or a look at hope. As a friend and I were discussing after our Saturday morning Zoom Bible study the words believe and trust came up. Both words are rich and full of meaning and depth, especially when taken in the context of the Holy Scriptures and our relationship with Christ.

Image by Lisa Caroselli from Pixabay

The word believe is defined: to accept something as true, genuine or real; to have a firm, wholehearted religious conviction or persuasion that the existence of God is true; to have a firm conviction as to the goodness, efficacy or ability of something.

The word trust is defined: the assured reliance on the character, ability, strength or truth of someone or something; dependence on something future or contingent - hope; to rely on the truthfulness or accuracy of - believe; to place confidence in - rely; to hope or expect confidently.

Both of these words have similar tones and you honestly can’t have trust without belief, nor can you experience true, life changing belief without trust. We can see this idea in the the story of the man who brings his demon possessed son to Jesus for healing. I did a more in depth look at this passage in 2022 when I chose believe as my word for the year.

“20 They brought the boy to Him. When he saw Him, immediately the spirit threw him into a convulsion, and falling to the ground, he began rolling around and foaming at the mouth.
21 And He asked his father, “How long has this been happening to him?” And he said, “From childhood.
22 It has often thrown him both into the fire and into the water to destroy him. But if You can do anything, take pity on us and help us!”
23 And Jesus said to him, “‘If You can?’ All things are possible to him who believes.”
24 Immediately the boy’s father cried out and said, “I do believe; help my unbelief.””

— Mark 9:20-24 (NASB 1995)

Image by Artur Skoniecki from Pixabay

This man took an actionable step from belief to trust. He recognized he did not have enough belief to go from “…if you can do anything…” to “Of course you can heal him! You are the Son of God.” (My own idea of what he might have said if he already placed his complete trust in Jesus.) He placed his trust in Christ when he exposed his vulnerability by saying, “help my unbelief."

This idea of trust is not easy. It is a step that takes us from a place of alleged safety to a place of exposure. Take for instance an individual going to a counselor seeking help for a mental health problem. Perhaps they are struggling with depression or anxiety. In order to take this action step they first need to see they have a problem that requires help. After they make that discovery they must call a therapist or psychiatrist. It might be that they ask friends and co-workers for the name of someone these people deem trustworthy. They make the call, setting up the appointment, then with some additional amount of fear they go to their first appointment.

When they are sitting in the therapist’s office they must answer this question: “Am I going to trust this person enough to really open up to them? Am I going to expose my inner most fears and struggles? Am I going to let them peek into my inner closet where all the skeletons and, perhaps demons, hang?” It is only by choosing to trust the professional with their struggles that the individual is going to make progress towards being mentally healthy and whole.

The same idea is true in our relationship with Christ. We come to Him by believing, but what makes our belief different than that of the fallen angels?

“18 But someone may well say, “You have faith and I have works; show me your faith without the works, and I will show you my faith by my works.”
19 You believe that God is one. You do well; the demons also believe, and shudder.
20 But are you willing to recognize, you foolish fellow, that faith without works is useless? ”

— James 2:18-20 (NASB 1995)

Our belief is a choice to open up to a mighty God and the first thing we must do is admit we have a problem. We are sinners. We are of the lineage of Adam and Eve and their sin became our sin. The only healing for this problem is to place ourselves in the hands of a pure and holy God. We come to Him hoping for His mercy, love and forgiveness and He freely gives it to us. This is the beginning of a life of trust.

Over the next twelve months we will look at the word trust and how a lack of it leads to a life of worry and fear, whereas a life of abandoning all to Him will free us up to know joy unspeakable. I hope you will join me.

Faith Inspiration - Oswald Chambers - Our Great Capacity for God - Part 1

Oswald Chamber’s devotional book My Utmost for His Highest has been one of my most used devotionals over a span of nearly three decades. The book, put together by his wife after his death at the young age of 43, gives 365 devotions taken from her notes of his sermons, talks and writings. Each devotion emphasizes a verse or two from the Scripture, and my personal habit is to read the entire chapter where the verse or verses are found. This has been a great exercise in learning more from God’s word and understanding the context of certain passages. Today I want to look at a quote from the devotional that struck me as profound and has stimulated a good deal of additional thought and study.

Image by congerdesign from Pixabay

“We are designed with a great capacity for God, but sin, our own individuality, and wrong thinking keep us from getting to Him. God delivers us from sin——we have to deliver ourselves from our individuality. This means offering our natural life to God and sacrificing it to Him, so He may transform it into spiritual life through our obedience...We must see to it that we aid and assist God, and not stand against Him...we must discipline ourselves. God will not bring our ‘arguments...and every thought into captivity to the obedience of Christ’ (2 Corinthians 10:5)——we have to do it.””

— November 18th

There are three things, Oswald lists that keep us from God. I want to take the next few months of these Faith Inspiration posts to look at these in depth and talk about steps we can take to get closer to our amazing God. Before we take an in depth look at the first of these deterrents, sin, next month, I want to talk about what it means to be “designed with a great capacity for God.”

We learn in the very first book of the Old Testament that we are creations of God. Not only are we His artistic work, we are made with His image stamped on our beings.

“26 Then God said, “Let Us make man in Our image, according to Our likeness; and let them rule over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the sky and over the cattle and over all the earth, and over every creeping thing that creeps on the earth.”
27 God created man in His own image, in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them.”

— Genesis 1:26-27 (NASB 1995)

We also see evidence of this Creator/creation connection in the New Testament.

“10 For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand so that we would walk in them.”

— Ephesians 2:10 (NASB 1995)

Image by endri yana yana from Pixabay

Just as an artist, or a craftsman puts a bit of themselves into the things they make: the pictures they paint, the statues they mold, the beautiful furniture they carve, God put a bit of Himself in each of us. It is in this imprint where our great capacity for Him lies. This image of Him we are created in enables us to know Him intimately, and to enjoy a pure and beautiful relationship with Him. This frontier is wide open, and yet we know so little. Just as many of the Israelites stood at the edge of the Promised land, but were denied access due to their stubborn sin of pride and lack of trust in God, we too stand at the edge of our great capacity to dive into the deeper layers of God, but fear, mistrust and pride keep us from jumping off the precipice.

The Psalmist also recognized our position before God. We are not His equal. We are His possession, but not a possession to be taken advantage of or abused. We are a possession He longs to come along side and care for.

“6 Come, let us worship and bow down,
Let us kneel before the Lord our Maker.
7 For He is our God,
And we are the people of His pasture and the sheep of His hand.
Today, if you would hear His voice,”

— Psalm 95:6-7 (NASB 1995)

“1 Shout joyfully to the Lord, all the earth.
2 Serve the Lord with gladness;
Come before Him with joyful singing.
3 Know that the Lord Himself is God;
It is He who has made us, and not we ourselves;
We are His people and the sheep of His pasture.
4 Enter His gates with thanksgiving
And His courts with praise.
Give thanks to Him, bless His name.
5 For the Lord is good;
His lovingkindness is everlasting
And His faithfulness to all generations.”

— Psalm 100 (NASB 1995)

Sheep do not care for themselves. They are cared for by a shepherd and Christ described Himself as our Good Shepherd. It is not the fact that we are truly like sheep. We can certainly take care of ourselves. Our humanity demands that we pull ourselves up by our own bootstraps and do what we have to do. Unfortunately, this independent spirit limits our capacity for God, and we will talk more about that when we look at the idea of our own individuality. No, we are not sheep, but perhaps the Psalmist and our Savior are making the same point, we should be.

“11 “I am the good shepherd; the good shepherd lays down His life for the sheep. 12 He who is a hired hand, and not a shepherd, who is not the owner of the sheep, sees the wolf coming, and leaves the sheep and flees, and the wolf snatches them and scatters them.
13 He flees because he is a hired hand and is not concerned about the sheep.
14 I am the good shepherd, and I know My own and My own know Me,
15 even as the Father knows Me and I know the Father; and I lay down My life for the sheep. ”

— John 10:11-15 (NASB 1995)

I believe to truly understand, as Oswald states, “our great capacity for God,” we must learn the ins and outs of humility and trust. We will look at these more fully next time as we delve into how sin keeps us from truly experiencing what that great capacity is. I hope you will follow along.

A Year of Waiting - Anticipate - Part 1: Waiting for the Wrong Things

The year is quickly drawing to a close and it is time for me to finish up my monthly series on my word for the year - Wait. This month I am going to focus these last few Faith posts on the word Anticipate. As we look forward to Christmas, the word anticipate seems apropos for the season. We are anticipating the holidays, the family gatherings, the cookie baking and the gift giving, but we wouldn’t celebrate if over two thousand years ago the birth of Christ was not anticipated.

The coming of the Messiah was prophesied in the Old Testament hundreds of years before Jesus Christ was born to a virgin in a pauper’s stable in Bethlehem. See this article on the Jews for Jesus website showing 40 Old Testament prophesies and their New Testament fulfillment. These are a few of the most famous surrounding Christ’s birth:

Image by PBernfeld from Pixabay

Born to a virgin.

Prophecy:

“14 Therefore the Lord Himself will give you a sign: Behold, a virgin will be with child and bear a son, and she will call His name Immanuel.”

— Isaiah 7:14 (NASB 1995)

Fulfillment:

“31 And behold, you will conceive in your womb and bear a son, and you shall name Him Jesus.
32 He will be great and will be called the Son of the Most High; and the Lord God will give Him the throne of His father David;
33 and He will reign over the house of Jacob forever, and His kingdom will have no end.”
34 Mary said to the angel, “How can this be, since I am a virgin?”
35 The angel answered and said to her, “The Holy Spirit will come upon you, and the power of the Most High will overshadow you; and for that reason the holy Child shall be called the Son of God.”

— Luke 1:31-35 (NASB 1995)

“23 “Behold, the virgin shall be with child and shall bear a Son, and they shall call His name Immanuel,” which translated means, “God with us.”
24 And Joseph awoke from his sleep and did as the angel of the Lord commanded him, and took Mary as his wife,
25 but kept her a virgin until she gave birth to a Son; and he called His name Jesus.”

— Matthew 1:23-27 (NASB 1995)

Image by G.C. from Pixabay

Born in Bethlehem.

Prophecy:

“2 “But as for you, Bethlehem Ephrathah,
Too little to be among the clans of Judah,
From you One will go forth for Me to be ruler in Israel.
His goings forth are from long ago,
From the days of eternity.””

— Micah 5:2 (NASB 1995)

Fulfillment:

“1 Now after Jesus was born in Bethlehem of Judea in the days of Herod the king, magi from the east arrived in Jerusalem, saying,
2 “Where is He who has been born King of the Jews? For we saw His star in the east and have come to worship Him.”
3 When Herod the king heard this, he was troubled, and all Jerusalem with him.
4 Gathering together all the chief priests and scribes of the people, he inquired of them where the Messiah was to be born. 5 They said to him, “In Bethlehem of Judea; for this is what has been written by the prophet:

6 ‘And you, Bethlehem, land of Judah,
Are by no means least among the leaders of Judah;
For out of you shall come forth a Ruler
Who will shepherd My people Israel.’”— Matthew 2:1-6 (NASB 1995)

Image by GERVASIO RUIZ from Pixabay

Descendant of David

Prophecy:

“12 When your days are complete and you lie down with your fathers, I will raise up your descendant after you, who will come forth from you, and I will establish his kingdom.
13 He shall build a house for My name, and I will establish the throne of his kingdom forever.
14 I will be a father to him and he will be a son to Me; when he commits iniquity, I will correct him with the rod of men and the strokes of the sons of men,
15 but My lovingkindness shall not depart from him, as I took it away from Saul, whom I removed from before you.
16 Your house and your kingdom shall endure before Me forever; your throne shall be established forever.”’””

— 2 Samuel 7:12-16 (NASB 1995)

Fulfillment:

“32 He will be great and will be called the Son of the Most High; and the Lord God will give Him the throne of His father David;
33 and He will reign over the house of Jacob forever, and His kingdom will have no end.””

— Luke 1:32-33 (NASB 1995)

“1 The record of the genealogy of Jesus the Messiah, the son of David, the son of Abraham:”

— Matthew 1:1 (NASB 1995)

Image by Pexels from Pixabay

Called out of Egypt.

Prophecy:

“When Israel was a youth I loved him,
And out of Egypt I called My son.”

— Hosea 11:1 (NASB 1995)

Fulfillment:

“13 Now when they had gone, behold, an angel of the Lord appeared to Joseph in a dream and said, “Get up! Take the Child and His mother and flee to Egypt, and remain there until I tell you; for Herod is going to search for the Child to destroy Him.”
14 So Joseph got up and took the Child and His mother while it was still night, and left for Egypt.
15 He remained there until the death of Herod. This was to fulfill what had been spoken by the Lord through the prophet: “Out of Egypt I called My Son.””

— Matthew 2:13-15 (NASB 1995)

I wanted to share these with you, not only as a reminder of what Christmas is truly about, but a reminder of who and what we are anticipating. The people of Israel were knowledgeable of the Old Testament scriptures. They memorized multiple portions and read and reread the commandments, the laws and the prophecies. However, knowing all this did not make them any more in tune when the true Messiah actually was born and dwelt among them. I believe that was because they were waiting for the wrong thing.

Many of the Jews at Jesus’ time were looking for a Messiah who would overthrow the oppressive Roman empire and lead them into a new kingdom with their Messiah as king. We have been studying the book of John in my Saturday morning Bible study and I have the distinct impression that the religious leaders would have preferred a puppet king that they could control. Jesus was far from the Messiah they were looking for.

“37 But though He had performed so many signs before them, yet they were not believing in Him.
38 This was to fulfill the word of Isaiah the prophet which he spoke: “Lord, who has believed our report? And to whom has the arm of the Lord been revealed?”
39 For this reason they could not believe, for Isaiah said again,
40 “He has blinded their eyes and He hardened their heart, so that they would not see with their eyes and perceive with their heart, and be converted and I heal them.”
41 These things Isaiah said because he saw His glory, and he spoke of Him.
42 Nevertheless many even of the rulers believed in Him, but because of the Pharisees they were not confessing Him, for fear that they would be put out of the synagogue;
43 for they loved the approval of men rather than the approval of God.”

— John 12:37-43 (NASB 1995)

We see in the above passage that unbelief was prophesied about Jesus’ ministry, and it was not just the unbelief of choice, but in many instances a situation where God “blinded their eyes” and “hardened their heart”. This is not an easy thing. We don’t like to hear that our loving God would purposefully keep people from getting into heaven, but many commentaries reveal that this hardening and blinding was already in process by the individuals’ unrelenting disbelief. Disbelief almost always turns a soft heart into unmovable stone. This truth makes me more grateful that our Lord has always kept a remnant of the Jewish people who believe He is the true Messiah, and that those of us who are Gentile were brought into the family of God just as much His sons and daughters as those who were from the lineage of Abraham.

All of this causes me to pause and ask the question, this Christmas what am I anticipating? What am I waiting for? Am I looking for a God who will get me out of a jam; who will get rid of the oppressive people in my life; make life comfortable for me? Or am I awaiting and anticipating a God who will bring me from the edge of the abyss to the deepest most profound peace a person could ever know?

Next week we will take a closer look at this idea of anticipation and how it leads us to hope. Until then have a great week.

Creative Christianity: The Widow's Quest - Part2

(This is a fictional piece based on the parable of the widow and the judge from Luke 18. I wrote this piece for entertainment purposes only.)

By the time Constance got to the second check point the rain was torrential. Her coat felt heavy as it took on water, and her tool bag was completely soaked. Thankfully, there was a long line of people which, she hoped, would make it easier for her to just slide through without much notice.

Image by StockSnap from Pixabay

As she stood in the line, she noticed the other people waiting. It was a hobby of hers, people watching. She had always enjoyed sitting in obscure places to watch people. People were so interesting and unique. That was how she and Amos had met. He had been sitting on a different bench a little way away from her at the small park near her parents’ home. Apparently, he enjoyed doing the same thing. It wasn’t that unusual. If you weren’t part of DeCaro’s network, there wasn’t much else to do.

She noticed him sitting there, and he noticed her. Eventually, they noticed each other noticing each other. One day when she arrived at her spot, he was sitting on her bench with a bag. Inside were two sandwiches. His pick up line had been, “I made too many sandwiches this morning. Would you mind eating one so I don’t have to throw it away?”

Image by WikimediaImages from Pixabay

They both laughed. No one ever threw anything away in the Rift. Every morsel, every scrap contributed towards keeping you alive.

The people in the line were mainly workers, but there were a few Hy-Breds. These were people from the upper echelon that came into the Rift to gamble, buy drugs, and abuse whoever they could, just because they had money. One couple in particular was getting impatient and tried to cut ahead of others in line. This caused a small fight to ensue.

Check points at the perimeter of the Rift were actual guard stations, all employed by DeCaro. Several guards came out to break up the fight. There were at least two people who scooted past the check point without getting their papers stamped. The problem with this lay in the fact that if they got caught outside the Rift without their papers in order they would be sent back to DeCaro, and from there most likely sent to the Extermination Yard.

Constance kept her head down and stayed out of the way while the guards took control of the situation. The Hy-Breds were taken inside to warm up while they waited for a ride to take them home. The others who fought back were beaten and not allowed to cross.

It was all so incredibly unfair. That was exactly why she was willing to risk an audience with the Lord of Minward. She had no idea what sort of a man he was, but she knew she had to try to get his attention focused on the Rift and the people who were being preyed on who lived there.

Image by gregkorg from Pixabay

“Papers!”

The man behind the window was angry, Constance assumed, for having to deal with the fight. DeCaro’s employees preferred to not have to work. She quickly presented her papers. He barely even looked at them before he stamped them and shoved them back at her. She fought the urge to grab them and run. Instead, she began to fold them while she still stood in front of the window.

“Move along!”

Constance moved slowly as if she was still struggling to get her papers back into her coat pocket before the rain completely soaked them. What she was really doing was trying to make herself look as inept as possible. She walked away, breathing a sigh of relief.

Just because she was no longer in the Rift, didn’t mean she was out of danger. Not everyone in the city of Minward were law abiding citizens. She kept alert. She was thankful once the rain slowed eventually stopping. She crossed a few streets, but at the next corner she knew she was being followed.

Image by 652234 from Pixabay

Running was not an option, so she decided to confront the person. She whirled, coming face to face with a young man, probably not more than twelve or thirteen. Startled, he stopped, looking at her with wide eyes.

“Can I help you, young man?”

“I…I…thought…maybe, I could help you…you know…for a little coin.” He gave her a sideways smile trying to look hopeful.

Constance sighed. “I’m sorry, lad. I don’t have any extra coin.”

The boy didn’t give up. “Well, what do you have in that bag? There’s got to be something valuable in there.”

Constance felt bad for the boy, but she also knew she wasn’t in a safe place. He might be working with a gang, and she could be surrounded before she knew it. “This is just my tool bag. Do you live around here?'“

“Here and there.”

She looked around, noting the windows, doors, and side streets. She didn’t notice any movement, so she started to relax.

“Where’s your family?”

“Dad left a while ago and hasn’t come back. My mom said, that’s because he’s no good. My mom….” It was plain to see the boy was grieving. “She got sick. Without a job, she couldn’t afford to go to the doctor. She died a few months ago.”

Constance’s heart broke for the boy. “You don’t have any other family? An aunt or uncle? Grandparents?”

He wiped at his eyes with his ragged shirt sleeve, and shook his head. “I had a baby sister, but she died when I was little. I never knew my grandparents.”

What could she do for this boy? She lived in the Rift. She was just as bad off as he was…well, that was not entirely true. She had been raised by two loving parents. She had known the love of a wonderful man. She had friends, and she had a purpose. An idea came to her; a crazy, but wonderful idea.

“Since I would be negligent to leave you alone would you like to come with me? I am going to see the Lord of Minward.”

The lad’s jaw dropped. “Do you have an invitation? I heard he don’t see anyone without an invitation.”

Constance was quiet for a moment. “Well, no, but I am going to see him anyway. I have to see him.” Her voice grew stronger. “Besides I could use the company, and you look like you could use a decent meal.”

“Hey! I thought you said you didn’t have any extra coin!”

“I don’t, for someone who is trying to take advantage of me, but I do have coin to share for someone who is a friend.”

The boy thought for a moment, then he smiled. “I can be your friend.”

“Good! Let’s be off then. I want to get to the upper city and the Manor of Minward by the time the sun is high over head. What’s your name, by the way?”

“My mom named me Peter, but you can call me Rocky.”

“Rocky it is. I am Constance, but you can call me Connie.”

Image by Gerd Altmann from Pixabay

Constance wasn’t sure if she believed in God or not, but for some reason this young boy had wormed his way into her heart and her mothering instinct took over. She and Amos had tried to have children, but never did, and then he died.

Maybe, just maybe she was being given a second chance.

Whatever Happens by Robert J. Morgan - A Book Review

(This book review is being done in exchange for the book. No money has exchanged hands for this review.)

I was contacted again by FrontGate Media to review a book. They send me numerous titles throughout the year, and I only choose certain ones to review. It needs to be worth my time to read the book, and it has to be something I am interested in keeping. This book by Robert J. Morgan is just that. You can read more about the author here.

Whatever Happens: How to Stand Firm in Your Faith When the World is Falling Apart is a deep dive into the book of Philippians, one of my favorite letters of Paul. The Apostle Paul is writing from Rome where he is a prisoner, to the church at Philippi. The introduction to the book gives us a good synopsis of what follows.

“Whatever. Whatever happens. The apostle Paul was facing uncharted circumstances and an unsettled future. He didn’t know if he would be released or executed. He didn’t know if he would live or die. But he knew one thing: Whatever happened, he was going to stand firm in the faith and conduct himself in a manner worthy of the gospel.”

— Robert J. Morgan, Whatever Happens p. x

This is the call for all of us who have given our lives to Christ. Whatever. Whatever happens, to stand firm in the faith and to live a life worthy of the gospel.

Morgan’s first two chapters set the background for how Paul came to Philippi by taking a look at the events in Acts 16:6-34. Reading through the passage we can see how God closed many doors to get Paul to the place He wanted him. Morgan makes a point that God’s will for our lives is progressive, premeditated, and purposeful, and that is why we need not get discouraged when a door closes. God always has the best plan.

Morgan also points out that during his stay in Philippi Paul doesn’t just make converts, he makes enemies who actually have him arrested, beaten, and thrown in jail. It is during this time of incarceration that we see the apostle and his companion Silas go from tending their wounds to worshipping their God in song. The aftermath of this time of worship includes an earthquake, a distraught guard, and the eventual conversion of the guard and his whole family.

“Through song and suffering, the church was planted in Philippi, and through song and suffering, we, too, serve the Lord faithfully with joy, even in our midnight hours.”

— Robert J. Morgan, Whatever Happens pp. 15

With a casual, easy to read style, Morgan gets into the meat of the book of Philippians by breaking the chapters down into bite sized sections. Each chapter of Morgan’s book delves into a group of connected verses. Morgan uses relevant stories, quotes, and examples to tie in how this letter of Paul is just as relevant to us today as it was to the new converts in the church at Philippi.

Each chapter starts with the words, Whatever Happens…Here are a few.

Chapter 3 - ….Layer Your Life with Generosity

Chapter 5 - …Remember God is Still Working on You

Chapter 7 - …Replace Gloomy Thoughts with Glorious Ones

Chapter 10 - …Never Be Intimidated

Chapter 20 - ...Actively Press On

Chapter 26 - …Discover the Secret to Contentment

Whatever Happens brings new insights to the book of Philippians, and how it applies to the times we are living in today. It is a strong reminder that God gives us the strength to press on when life is difficult, and He gives us the ability to have joy in the midst of those hard times.

Here are just a few of the quotes I highlighted in my copy:

“As we grow in Agape, we make wiser decisions because we develop greater knowledge and depth of insight.”

— Robert J. Morgan, Whatever Happens pp. 43

“The circumstances of our lives have become servants of Christ’s commands. Our circumstances must bow before Jesus. We may not be able to control them, and chaos may seem to reign. But the Savior who turned water into wine and death into life can bring about a mutation, a transfiguration, a reversal, an evolution of our circumstances. The Savior can turn our circumstances into His servants for the advancement of His Kingdom. This is part of redemption.”

— Robert J. Morgan, Whatever Happens pp. 52

“The attitude of exalting Christ whatever happens has the power to weaken or destroy the grip of circumstance-based anxiety in our lives—-to live is Christ and to die is gain.”

— Robert Morgan, Whatever Happens pp. 69

“I cannot grow spiritually without keeping a positive attitude about life.”

— Robert J. Morgan, Whatever Happens pp. 103

“God put the burning stars into a dark sky to teach us something about our own lives and about the mission He has for us. We are to shine His light into a dark world. I cannot think of a single better way of using my time than by holding forth the Word of Life.”

— Quote Source

“...I had never before thought of joy as a safeguard, as a shield, as a weapon, as an invisible cloak around me, or as a guardian who served as a security officer.”

— Robert J. Morgan, Whatever Happens pp. 127

I could go on, but I hope reading a few of these quotes gives you a taste of the knowledgable and thorough insight the author has put into this look at Philippians. I believe this book is apropos for the times we are living in. We are living in a darkened world, and God desires we be the lights that shine spreading the Gospel of Jesus Christ.

I found this book spoke to my heart, bringing a new understanding of the Letter of Paul to the Philippians. It reminded me that my faith is never stagnant and I have never arrived. There is always more to learn. I would strongly recommend Whatever Happens to every Christ follower.

Faith Topics: Why is it Necessary to Study the Bible?

Let’s face it, life is busy, especially if you are working, have children, or are involved in any sort of activities outside the home. People just have a lot to do these days. If I am a Christian and believe in eternal security (once saved, always saved) what’s the point of studying the Bible? Isn’t it enough to hear it on Sunday morning? Isn’t reading it once in a while more than sufficient to keep me grounded in my Christian faith?

Image by wal_172619 from Pixabay

There are several thoughts I have on this topic and I think it is an important issue to address. Let’s start by looking at what scripture itself has to say.

“16 All Scripture is inspired by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, for training in righteousness; 17 so that the man of God may be adequate, equipped for every good work.”

— 2 Timothy 3:16-17 (NASB 1995)

This verse gives us several good reasons to study God’s word.

1 - All of Scripture is inspired by God.

Image by Aritha from Pixabay

If you were interested in learning more about a certain historical figure, Hollywood star or famous pop singer would you go to the Tabloids or would you want to go to the direct source? An autobiography is going to be more revealing about a person than a few short paragraphs about where they were last seen and who they were last hanging out with. If we claim to be Christians and want to live a Christ like life then the place to go is the Word of God to receive information that is most accurate and truthful. God, Himself, inspired the men who wrote the words. I believe this is the most accurate historical document we have.

2 - All of Scripture is profitable for teaching, reproof, correction, and for training in righteousness.

Image by Dolf Maurer from Pixabay

Think about this for a minute. If you read a magazine, a textbook, or a fictional piece, each one may give you some sort of benefit. You might learn how to cook a certain dish from a recipe book. You might learn more about what vitamins to take as you age from a magazine on aging. You might find yourself swept away by a riveting adventure which helps you relax. However, unlike the Bible most things we read are not able to do everything the Bible can do.

The Bible is a historical account of the Nation of Israel, giving us a history lesson. The Bible is a book of poetry and love. The Bible gives us steps to ease anxiety, love our neighbor, and forgive those who have hurt us. The Bible teaches us how to live, how to love and how to have a relationship with an amazing God.

3 - All Scripture enables us to be adequate and equipped for every good work.

Image by free stock photos from www.picjumbo.com from Pixabay

You know what I like most about that last phrase? The word adequate. It doesn’t tell us that we will be perfect. It doesn’t say we will be all knowing, powerful, or rich. It says we will be adequate. Webster’s Online Dictionary defines the word adequate as: Sufficient for a specific need or requirement; good enough. God gives us what we need when we need it. He doesn’t give us more. Why do you think this is? It might have something to do with humility and dependence.

Our ability to be equipped for every good work, isn’t dependent on our ability. It is dependent on God. This fact takes us back to the first two points…it’s all from Him, and it is meant for teaching, correction, training, etc. We have to be continuing to learn and study and grow.

Another familiar verse in the Bible about why we should study it is the following:

“Study to shew thyself approved unto God, a workman that needeth not to be ashamed, rightly dividing the word of truth.”

— 2 Timothy 2:15 (KJV)

I went for the King James Version of this verse, as it is the verse I remember growing up with. It is one of the few versions that uses the word study and links it to the ability to understand accurately what God’s word is saying. We don’t need to be ashamed if we know God’s word, what it says and what it means. If we look at the New American Standard version, it reads a little differently, but the end result is still the same. We are to be diligent workmen, who don’t need to be ashamed, because we know how to handle God’s word.

“Be diligent to present yourself approved to God as a workman who does not need to be ashamed, accurately handling the word of truth.”

— 2 Timothy 2:15 (NASB 1995)

If we just look at this one verse we can come up with several more reasons we should study God’s Word.

1 - To be able to present ourselves to God.

Image by svklimkin from Pixabay

Accepting Jesus as our Lord and Savior is merely the first step in a life time of growth and knowledge as we get to know Him more and more. Not only are we getting to know Him better, but He is making us more like Christ. When we know His word, we can bring that to Him and show that we know Him and His desires for us. Knowing and studying His word is like giving a gift back to him. We are saying that we agree with what He has said.

2 - To be an unashamed workman.

Image by 652234 from Pixabay

Often what makes us feel ashamed in our Christian walk, is not what Jesus has done for us, or our belief in Him, but our inability to talk about those things. I believe one of the important ways we become better able to talk about our faith and defend it is by knowing what the Bible says. Regular study of the Word helps us to walk with Him without feeling unable to share our faith.

3 - To be able to accurately handle truth.

Image by Markus Winkler from Pixabay

Regular study of God’s word will not only make us more confident, but will enable us to know what is true and what is untrue. There are many who believe the Bible is just another book. They might even acknowledge that it has historical significance, but they do not believe everything in it to be true. They argue that everything from creation and the flood, to the virgin birth and resurrection were just fabrications put together by a random string of zealots to lead people into some sort of cult like living. The problem with many of these supposed arguments is that they really don’t take into account the actual words of the scriptures. A question both my husband and I ask people who say they don’t believe is, “Have you ever read the book?” Most often the answer is, “No.”

Let’s not depend on the world to tell us whether to believe the Bible or not. Let’s allow the Holy Spirit to do what He is best at, revealing the truth in the living, God breathed, words of Scripture. Paul admonished us in the book of Colossians:

“8 See to it that no one takes you captive through philosophy and empty deception, according to the tradition of men, according to the elementary principles of the world, rather than according to Christ. ”

— Colossians 2:8 (NASB 1995)

Paul also instructed Timothy about not listening to the “irreverent babble”.

“20 O Timothy, guard what has been entrusted to you, avoiding worldly and empty chatter and the opposing arguments of what is falsely called “knowledge”—
21 which some have professed and thus gone astray from the faith.”

— I Timothy 6:20-21 (NASB 1995)

I hope this gives you a little motivation to start looking at the Scriptures with more time and care, for in studying His Word we will be blessed with a deeper relationship with Him.

Creative Christianity - The Widow's Quest: Part 1

The following piece begins a series based on the passage found in Luke 18:1-8. It presents a fictional account with allegorical aspects which coincide with the parable told by Jesus in those Scriptures. This is a fictional story with a world, and characters built by me. I hope you enjoy it.

Constance made her way through the narrow, muddy streets, thankful it was raining. A constant downpour washed away some of the surface filth making her feel there was a modicum of cleanliness here in the Rift. She kept her head down, the hood of her coat concealing her face. She didn’t want anyone to know where she was going. If they found out she was on her way to the Manor of Minward they would beat her until she was no longer recognizable. The Black Needles didn’t appreciate the people of their ward asking for help. They didn’t need help. They could make it on their own.

Image by Lucent_Designs_dinoson20 from Pixabay

Constance smirked beneath her hood. Neoplo “The Builder” De Caro wasn’t just known for building the run down, decaying ruins the people of the Rift had to live in, but for raising up the crime syndicate that preyed on the very people it was supposed to protect. She had seen enough; enough suffering; enough struggle; enough darkness. If the Lord of Minward was truly just, as she had often heard through her fourty-three years, why didn’t anything change? She was going to find out.

She was going to have to get past a few of De Caro’s check points. He wasn’t fond of people leaving his barony. He had an intricate web of knowledge woven together by his army of groveling lackeys. Constance learned from the time she was very young to blend in. She didn’t want to stand out. Being noticed by Neopolo, meant you became one of his, either that, or you conveniently disappeared. She felt bad for the younger people. De Caro’s appetite wasn’t just reserved for food and drink.

Constance felt bile rise in her throat, but she swallowed it, and clenched her fists. She wasn’t going to become just another of De Caro’s appetizers. She had to have hope; hope that the Lord of Minward would be able to make a change. Maybe he just wasn’t aware of how bad it was in the Rift. As the Lord of an entire city, he must be very busy, and maybe information wasn’t getting through due to De Caro’s influence.

The first check point loomed ahead. Her training in boiler maintenance should be able to get her through this one. She felt the tool bag by her side, then slid her hand into her coat pocket where the forged work papers printed on union stationary, and folded neatly, stayed dry from the down pour.

Image by Anna Veronika from Pixabay

Constance wasn’t alone in this quest. There were a few others who wanted a better life, and knew De Caro’s empire building wasn’t going to benefit them. She and Amos had formed a small group of other “believers”, which now was up to twenty members. They rarely all met together, but stayed in touch using messages sent via trusted couriers. Since the steam movement, and its subsequent advancements in communications, things like sending handwritten messages on foot had become obsolete. Now things were moved along through vast tubular networks both above and below ground pushed along by the compressed power of steam.

Amos had been like a little boy, completely enamored with the advent of the new Steam Era. He loved the machines, the gears, the noise and the power behind something so simple as heated water. She missed him terribly. It was coming up on five years since his death, but grief was relentless where darkness bred, and the Rift was a breeding ground for all that was dank, and miserable.

Image by Peter H from Pixabay

Constance took a deep breath and moved confidently to the first check point. Each check point held a small booth barely big enough for one person, but often occupied by several of Neoplo’s goons. There were three of them in this one. They were chatting and laughing. There were several other people in line.

When her turn came, Constance pulled the papers out of her pocket and quickly shoved them through the small opening in the window.

The man looked down on her, from where he sat in the dry, heated booth.

“You in a hurry there, lass?”

Constance wanted to quip back she was old enough to be his mother, but didn’t reply, just shrugged. She found the best thing to do was not engage. Once you started talking, they became interested. She waited, turning to look at the line that was forming behind her. That was a good thing. The more people waiting, the less time they would take to push you through.

The man stamped her papers and passed them back through the window. As she reached to take them, he wouldn’t let go. She looked up at his scruffy face.

Image by Sammy-Sander from Pixabay

“Smile, Sunshine. Life ain’t so bad. Doesn’t old De Caro take good care of his people?”

Constance swallowed the retort brewing in her gut, gave a shy smile and nodded her head.

“There we go! You have a good night now, lass!”

Constance placed the papers back in her coat pocket. As she walked away she let out a deep breath. One more check point to go.