Embracing Sadness and Finding Joy: A Study of our Life in Jesus during the Holidays - Part 2: Remembering God's Faithfulness

If you are following along this December, I am doing a short series on the emotion of sadness during the holidays. Holidays for many are not the bright, merry celebrations we tend to hear about. Instead, they are filled with pain, hurt, anger, sadness and despair. The reasons are many, from the death of a spouse or child, to divorce, to the loss of a job or health, to the state of our country. Many people are struggling with feeling depressed and overwhelmed.

Image by Armando Orozco from Pixabay

The reason I decided to broach this topic was in part to share what I have learned about carrying sadness on a regular basis, but still being able to function and live a full and productive life. Sadness isn’t something that we necessarily need to be free of, but rather something we need to embrace and learn how to accept and manage.

Last week we looked at what embracing sadness looks like and explored a few thoughts on how we can manage our own sadness, or how we can help others who are feeling more down than usual at this time of year. Tips included: having a grieving blanket, physical activity, artistic pursuits, and allowing others to help carry the burden. Another suggestion was to remember the faithfulness of God, and that is what we are going to look at this week.

The Old and New Testaments of the Bible are full of examples of God’s faithfulness. If we are in a particular dark state of mind we might read some of the Biblical accounts and only see God’s wrath, judgment and impatience, but as with all things if we look only for the darkness, we will only encounter darkness. True freedom lies in following and embracing the light of Christ.

Image by Daniel Reche from Pixabay

1 In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God.
2 He was in the beginning with God.
3 All things were made through him, and without him was not any thing made that was made.
4 In him was life, and the life was the light of men.
5 The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it.
6 There was a man sent from God, whose name was John.
7 He came as a witness, to bear witness about the light, that all might believe through him.
8 He was not the light, but came to bear witness about the light.
9 The true light, which gives light to everyone, was coming into the world.
10 He was in the world, and the world was made through him, yet the world did not know him.
11 He came to his own, and his own people did not receive him.
12 But to all who did receive him, who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God,
13 who were born, not of blood nor of the will of the flesh nor of the will of man, but of God.
14 And the Word became flesh and dwelt among us, and we have seen his glory, glory as of the only Son from the Father, full of grace and truth.
15 (John bore witness about him, and cried out, “This was he of whom I said, ‘He who comes after me ranks before me, because he was before me.’”)
16 For from his fullness we have all received, grace upon grace.
17 For the law was given through Moses; grace and truth came through Jesus Christ.
18 No one has ever seen God; God the only Son, who is at the Father’s side, he has made him known.
— John 1:1-18 (ESV)

God provides everything that we need to live life in this dark world, but the most important thing He provided was the Light, the life of His Son Jesus Christ. Try to imagine living in a world with no light. How would you be able to live life? There is the rather comedic aspect of running into walls, crashing into cars, and stepping on Legos in the living room, but it goes much deeper than that. Light is essential for plants to grow, which in turn produce oxygen, which gives us the ability to breath. Light is essential for our mental health. Take it from a sufferer of Seasonal Affective Disorder, sunlight is absolutely necessary for me to feel human. Light is also an important element in the deterrence of crime, otherwise, why would so many business owners leave lights on around their property?

Probably the most important aspect to light is that it lets us see. There is the physical aspect of sight which keeps us from running into things and helps us to recognize things and people. It also allows us to learn and study. Similarly, spiritual sight, given to us through the Holy Spirit, allows us to know God and His Word better. Abiding in the light enables to turn from the darkness and recognize God’s constant faithfulness.

“The Rock! His work is perfect, For all His ways are just; A God of faithfulness and without injustice, Righteous and upright is He.
— Deuteronomy 32:4 (NASB 1995)
Your lovingkindness, O Lord, extends to the heavens, Your faithfulness reaches to the skies.
— Psalm 36:5 (NASB 1995)
He will cover you with His pinions, And under His wings you may seek refuge; His faithfulness is a shield and bulwark.
— Psalm 91:4 (NASB 1995)

I find this last verse interesting. “His faithfulness is a shield and bulwark.” We all know what a shield is, but what is a bulwark? Websters online dictionary defines bulwark as: a solid wall-like structure raised for defense; a seawall; a strong support or protection. If God’s faithfulness is a shield and bulwark, then that means His faithfulness is supporting and protecting us. Might it also mean, that when we choose to remember His faithfulness, it helps protect our minds from spending too much time in the darkness? Perhaps recalling God’s faithfulness is the best way to protect ourselves from the unbridled pain and despair we can feel when we are grieving.

In other versions of the Bible instead of the word, bulwark, or rampart the word is buckler. A buckler is a small shield and to my understanding it was a shield that was used during hand to hand combat. It was a shield that was held close to the body, and could also be maneuvered to block the enemy’s strikes. Whether you like the idea of a strong wall of defense or a small shield used in daily battle with the enemy, the reality is both are true. God is our defense, and His faithfulness allows us to extinguish the flaming arrows of despair, bitterness and hatred that Satan sends our way.

As I said in my first post, sadness is an emotion God gave us and by embracing it we allow ourselves to process those strong feelings in a healthy way, but if we allow ourselves to only see the sadness, and not remember the joy, or the laughter, we risk becoming shrouded in a darkness that might lead to a place of no return.

So, how do we remember God’s faithfulness when we are feeling overwhelmed by the sad? Let’s look at a few ideas.

1 - Pray. Ask God to help you to remember His faithfulness. Perhaps you prayed for something specific and that prayer was answered. Maybe you needed direction regarding a decision and He gave it to you. Remember God is not just faithful in the big things, He’s also faithful in the tiny details. Ask Him to help you remember those times and write those things down.

I did this recently, and God brought to my mind His faithfulness to me as a child. Growing up in a Bible believing church, I was fortunate to be surrounded by Biblical teaching, but hearing God’s word, does not necessarily mean we will follow Him. When I was very young, perhaps in kindergarten or 1st grade I had a Sunday School teacher named Miss Draper. An older, single woman, she was all vim and vinegar, but she genuinely cared about her students. I remember she took a trip to Europe. When she came back she had gifts for each of the children in her class. When I opened mine it was a little chalet of sorts. The roof opened and from within came the most beautiful music. Her gesture of kindness set me on a road of wanting to know Jesus. Oh what the love of a person living in obedience to Christ can do to change the world.

Image by Steve Haselden from Pixabay

2 - Read Scripture. I know these suggestions are not anything new, but how much more we need to be seeking our precious Lord, when we are in the throes of sadness and heartbreak. Scripture is full of examples of God’s faithfulness. Think of His provision for Adam and Eve’s nakedness after the fall (Genesis 3:21); or what about His faithfulness to Noah and His family during a catastrophic, world wide flood (Genesis 7:23); and don’t forget the restoration He gave to Job after allowing Satan to take everything away (Job 42:10-17); and one of my favorite accounts of His lovingkindness was to Ruth, a woman not even a Jew, given a place in the lineage of Jesus our King of Kings (Ruth 4). Start to finish, the Bible is a ribbon of God’s faithfulness, provision, love and intervention on the behalf of humanity, the greatest of these being Christ’s entry into our world as a baby.

mage by Ingela Skullman from Pixabay

3 - Look for God’s faithfulness and provision in the day to day. All may seem bleak until we start exercising the eyes of our hearts. Our physical eyes might only see the darkness; the pain, the despair, the unknown, but our spiritual eyes can see things beyond this physical world.

15 For this reason I too, having heard of the faith in the Lord Jesus which exists among you and your love for all the saints,
16 do not cease giving thanks for you, while making mention of you in my prayers;
17 that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of glory, may give to you a spirit of wisdom and of revelation in the knowledge of Him.
18 I pray that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened, so that you will know what is the hope of His calling, what are the riches of the glory of His inheritance in the saints,
19 and what is the surpassing greatness of His power toward us who believe. These are in accordance with the working of the strength of His might
20 which He brought about in Christ, when He raised Him from the dead and seated Him at His right hand in the heavenly places,
21 far above all rule and authority and power and dominion, and every name that is named, not only in this age but also in the one to come.
22 And He put all things in subjection under His feet, and gave Him as head over all things to the church,
23 which is His body, the fullness of Him who fills all in all.
— Ephesians 1:15-23 (NASB 1995)

Paul’s prayer pertains to us when we are grieving. He prays that we would see with the eyes of our hearts so that: we would know the hope of His calling, the riches of the glory of His inheritance in the saints, and what is the surpassing greatness of His power toward us who believe. Look and see.

Image by Adrian from Pixabay

4 - Treasure thanksgiving. Having just celebrated Thanksgiving a few weeks ago here in the U.S. it is good to take this idea into the Christmas holidays, especially when we are sad. Giving thanks is not only a mood lifter, but it forces us to refocus our mind from the darkness to the light. Start small if that is all you can manage. Thank God for a warm bed, a hot shower, food, clean water, and a place to live. Even if all of these were striped away from us, we could still be thankful for Him; for His presence; for His character; for the fact that He does not change. Is it always easy to give thanks? No. But it is desired by our Creator.

in everything give thanks; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.
— 1 Thessalonians 5:18 (NASB 1995)

I hope this week you will find many moments to remember God’s faithfulness.

When Darkness Comes - Part 9: The Transformative Power of Thanksgiving

We all have heard the old saying that we are to have an attitude of gratitude. Most of us are aware of the difference a mindset of thankfulness can have on our thoughts, emotions and actions.

Nothing is more honorable than a grateful heart.
— Seneca
Gratitude can transform common days into thanksgivings, turn routine jobs into joy, and change ordinary opportunities into blessings
— William Arthur Ward
Gratitude turns what we have into enough.
— Aesop

God’s Word is clear on the importance of giving thanks.

in everything give thanks; for this is the will of God for you in Christ Jesus.
— I Thessalonians 5:18 (NASB)

Just as the Bible commands us to, “Rejoice always” (1 Thessalonians 5:16), and “pray without ceasing” (I Thessalonians 5:17), we are also commanded to give thanks at all times in everything. That means we are to give thanks when the darkness is upon us. We are to give thanks for it, in it and after it has left us. Why is it so important that we thank God when we are in the darkness? Let’s look at a few different reasons.

1 - It places us under His authority.

Image by David Mark from Pixabay

Image by David Mark from Pixabay

The act of remembering who we are and who God is enables us to have perspective. Being thankful places us in our correct standing before Him. Pride, which places us above God, saying we can get through this ourselves and we don’t need anyone’s help, especially His, makes us the authority and not God.

Every person is to be subject to the governing authorities. For there is no authority except from God, and those which exist are established by God.
— Romans 13:1 (NASB)

Knowing there is authority and actually placing ourselves under it are two different things. When we give thanks we recognize God as the one true authority.

2 - It places us under His protection.

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1 One who dwells in the shelter of the Most High
Will lodge in the shadow of the Almighty.
2 I will say to the Lord, “My refuge and my fortress,
My God, in whom I trust!”
3 For it is He who rescues you from the net of the trapper
And from the deadly plague.
4 He will cover you with His pinions,
And under His wings you may take refuge;
His faithfulness is a shield and wall.

5 You will not be afraid of the terror by night,
Or of the arrow that flies by day;
6 Of the plague that [a]stalks in darkness,
Or of the destruction that devastates at noon.
7 A thousand may fall at your side
And ten thousand at your right hand,
But it shall not approach you.
8 You will only look on with your eyes
And see the retaliation against the wicked.
9 For you have made the Lord, my refuge,
The Most High, your dwelling place.
10 No evil will happen to you,
Nor will any plague come near your tent.

11 For He will give His angels orders concerning you,
To protect you in all your ways.
12 On their hands they will lift you up,
So that you do not strike your foot against a stone.
13 You will walk upon the lion and cobra,
You will trample the young lion and the [d]serpent.

14 “Because he has loved Me, I will save him;
I will set him securely on high, because he has known My name.
15 He will call upon Me, and I will answer him;
I will be with him in trouble;
I will rescue him and honor him.
16 I will satisfy him with a long life,
And show him My salvation.”
— Psalm 91

Why does giving thanks place us under His protection? The choice to be thankful requires a shift in our mindset. We know our Unseen Enemy loves to play mind games. If we are teetering on the edge of anger, bitterness, malice, wrath and other bad emotions, we are going to be more susceptible to making choices that are not for our benefit. Dark emotions are part of our sin nature, and very normal, but God does not want us to stay in those murky places. Staying there will result in our undoing.

3 - It lets in the light.

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Giving thanks is like turning on a flashlight or lighting a candle when you are in a very dark room. When darkness is present in our lives and we are grieving, depressed, struggling, or lost, the choice to thank God allows Him to open the tiniest window into our shadowed world. You might not see the light right away. Often we become accustomed to the darkness and we might even forget what it was like to walk in the light, but light will always pierce the darkness.

When I was going through the dark time I have been sharing with you, I spent three days praying and journaling, most of which I have been sharing with you through these posts. On the last day, the last thing I did was lay before God the reasons I felt the way I did. There is a difference between acknowledging the emotion and knowing why we feel what we are feeling.

Lord, perhaps what would help my sagging spirits is to confess to you all that is making me sad. I am sad...
— Amy's Journal - 5/23/21

I went on to tell Jesus, exactly what I was grieving over: my marriage, my family, relationships, being alone, my imperfections…the list went on. I ended that section with this.

So, I bring it all to You. The desires, the sadness, the disappointment. I bring it to You, and I choose to wait on You. I don’t know what to look for - a miracle? A rescue? A ta da moment? Whatever it is I trust You to bring it about. In the mean time I lean into Your strength and Your courage.”
— Amy's Journal - 5/23/21

However, I did not stop there.

Now I need to give thanks.

I thank You, that the darkness and the light are the same to You.

Thank You, that as You hovered over the darkness of the deep at the beginning of Creation - You are here in my darkness - hovering over, beneath, beside and through.

Thank You, that while I do not have a friend right now to talk to or hang out with, I do have You.

Thank You, that You have shown Yourself to me since I was very young.

Thank You, that no matter what others say, You call me beloved!

Thank You, that I am not condemned, because I am in Christ Jesus.

Thank You, that as I choose to wait on You, You give me strength and courage.
— Amy's Journal - 5/23/21

There was more on that list, and when I finished thanking God, I felt Him say to me, “You done good, now rest.”

Did I feel better? Not really, but I felt as though I had wrestled and wrangled. I wouldn’t realize the sword of the Almighty had pierced me until the next day. I’ll share that next week.

Until then, be thankful. God truly uses all things for our good.